


Dreams

by Frodo_sHeart



Category: The Hobbit (Jackson Movies), The Hobbit - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alzheimer's Disease, Awkward Thorin, Bach, Cute Bilbo, First Kiss, M/M, Romance, Sassy Bilbo, Yet more fluff, adorably unworldly Thorin, bring your toothbrush, naive Thorin, shameless fluff, some gay slurs by a minor character, some more gay intolerance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-09-29
Updated: 2014-10-20
Packaged: 2018-02-19 03:48:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 29,485
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2373398
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Frodo_sHeart/pseuds/Frodo_sHeart
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Senior Accountant Thorin Durin, who is a bit unworldly, has to do community service because he was caught drink-driving after having his orange juice spiked, and he ends up as a domestic help at old mrs Baggins’ house. Mrs Baggins has Alzheimer’s and a rather attractive son...</p><p> </p><p>Each chapter is a rounded whole.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Dreams

Thorin had never felt this awkward in his life. Not even when he had to appear in court. Community service. He had expected to sweep streets or something, not cleaning the house of an elderly person. Whoever thought up these services must be of a devious mind. 

Reluctantly he raised his hand and rang the bell of the terraced house. Prepared for having to wait until the old lady arrived at the door, he was startled when he heard swift footsteps and found the door being opened quickly.

‘Oh, I am so glad you are here! I am very sorry since you’re new, but I promised I’d be early today, and I really should be going.’ 

Thorin gaped at the back of the short man walking away from him while he was putting on a long tailored coat. The man grabbed a small messenger bag from a sidetable and turned to him. He had a kind, rather handsome face, but he looked harried.

‘You will find everything in the kitchen. I have left a list of chores and a note with my number, but please use it only if really necessary.’ He frowned when he saw Thorin still gaping. ‘You have done this before, haven’t you?’

Slowly Thorin shook his head. He really didn’t know what to say. 

‘Oh, bollocks,’ sighed the man. He dropped his bag on the floor, passed his hand over his face. ‘I’m sorry. I asked them to send only experienced domestic help.’

Thorin felt his face fall. He had himself all worked up, and now this.

‘I will call them,’ he said hesitantly. ‘They will find a different address for me to serve my... to work my hours.’

‘Serve... oh god, the community service! You’re the one from the community service! I asked them to send you on Friday afternoon when I can be here. When are they going to learn how to read a calendar!’ The man whipped his phone from his pocket and started to touch the screen, but then he lowered his hand. He looked very tired.

‘There really is no time,’ the man said. ‘I am going to be late again and Mr Brandybuck is going to yell at me all day and I’m not sure I can handle that right now.’

‘I could stay,’ Thorin hazarded. The man looked at him with rather fierce dark blue eyes. He had longish, curly, dark blond hair and Thorin couldn’t help noticing again that he was really pleasant to look at. The thought made his cheeks heat up. ‘I will try...’

‘Have you ever worked with people who have Alzheimer’s?’ the man asked.

‘A-alzheimer’s?’

The man smiled a sad smile.

‘Thought so. Look, it’s nothing personal, but I can’t just leave you alone with my mother when you have no experience at all.’ He stared at his phone. ‘Mrs Proudfoot can only be here at twelve, when your shift ends. Mrs Gamgee is staying with her daughter this week. Drogo and Primula are out of town too. There really is nobody to call.’ He looked thoroughly dejected and Thorin suddenly felt very sorry for him.

‘Is it very difficult?’ he asked. ‘Maybe if you call me a few times to see if things are alright? I’m really willing to try, sir.’ How hard could it be to clean a house in the presence of an old lady, even if she has Alzheimer’s? ‘I will give you my personal number.’ They weren’t supposed to give out their numbers, but if it would help this obviously rather desperate man, Thorin didn’t mind.

The man gazed at him again. 

‘If it’s because of my sentence, that was only for drunk driving and it wasn’t really my fault and nobody was hurt, it was just a checkpoint. I-I’m a senior accountant with Erebor Accountancy.’ Thorin knew he was rambling and felt his cheeks become even redder.

The man smiled. His whole face lit up and suddenly Thorin’s belly felt very strange.

‘You didn’t have to tell me that,’ the man said. ‘I know that the sentences are for small transgressions only. They wouldn’t send criminals to do this work.’

‘You can check with Erebor Accountancy if you want,’ said Thorin. ‘I have been with them for twenty years now.’

The man was still smiling. 

‘That is a very long time,’ he said. ‘I have only been with Took-Brandybuck for ten years and that seems like forever.’ 

‘Took-Brandybuck Men’s Wear?’ Thorin asked. His father used to buy his suits there. ‘Are they still in business?’

‘Oh yes,’ said the man. ‘Have been for 150 years now.’ He extended his hand. ‘I’m Bilbo Baggins,’ he said.

Thorin shook his hand.

‘Thorin Durin,’ he said.

‘Come with me, Thorin,’ Mr Baggins said. ‘Let me introduce you to my mother.’

***********

‘Would you like some tea?’ Mrs Baggins asked for the fifteenth time. Thorin looked up from the cabinet he was dusting. He gave her a small smile.

‘Not yet, Mrs Baggins. In about half an hour I will take a break and I will make us both a cup of tea.’ He went back to carefully removing all the knicknacks from the top and dusting under them, before putting them back exactly where he had found them.

‘You are really good.’

He nearly jumped when Mrs Baggins’ voice spoke near his ear.

‘Most of them just dust around everything, you know. Not like we were used to in my day.’ The old lady touched a small statue of a bird. At that moment Thorin’s mobile rang.

‘Bach!’ exclaimed Mrs Baggins. She started to hum the melody of [‘Jesus bleibet meine Freude’](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d9EN27Zh_vg) while Thorin swiped the screen.

‘Durin,’ he said.

‘Hello Thorin, this is Bilbo. How are things going?’

‘Very well, thank you,’ Thorin said. Suddenly Mrs Baggins started to sing quite loudly.

_

‘Meiner Augen Lust und Sonne.’

_

Thorin turned around, astonished.

‘You know the German text?’ he exclaimed.

__

_‘Meiner Seele Schatz und Wonne;  
Darum lass ich Jesum nicht  
Aus dem Herzen und Gesicht.’_

There was something strangely beautiful about the old, thin voice singing that wonderful melody. Mrs Baggins started anew, she hummed the instrumental parts in between the text. She was swaying around the room as if she was dancing, eyes closed. He watched her until a soft cough reminded him he was on the phone.

‘Thorin?’

‘Oh, I’m sorry, Mr Baggins, it’s just, your mother...’

‘She will go on for hours if you let her,’ the man chuckled. ‘Did you find the CD player then?’

‘Umm, no, my ringtone...’

‘Your ringtone is Bach? That’s...’ Mr Baggins’ voice trailed off. There was a short silence. ‘Look, I have to go back to work. Are you sure everything is alright?’

‘Quite alright, don’t worry, Mr Baggins.’

‘Bilbo, please.’

‘Bilbo,’ repeated Thorin.

‘I will call again in an hour.’

‘Yes, of course.’ Thorin stared at Mrs Baggins singing and swaying, before he set out to find the CD player.

When Mrs Proudfoot arrived at 12.15, she found the both of them sitting quietly in the living room, eyes closed, surrounded by the flowing melody of ['Air’](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rrVDATvUitA).

******************

‘Thorin! Come in!’ Mr Baggins looked just as nice as he remembered. Thorin had steeled himself so he didn’t blush when the man smiled at him. 

‘Thank you, sir,’ he said. 

‘Bilbo, please. I’m not a sir.’ Bilbo chuckled.

‘Sorry, sir... I mean, Bilbo.’ Now of course he *was* blushing. Silently cursing himself for being such a stuffy old bore, Thorin divested of his coat and followed Bilbo to the living room, trying not to look at the man’s bottom, which filled out the expensive looking grey trousers quite nicely. He was sure his ears were red too by the time they entered the room.

‘It’s Thorin again today, mum,’ said Bilbo cheerfully.

‘I’m sorry, have we met?’ asked Mrs Baggins pleasantly. ‘I am sure I would have remembered such a handsome man.’ She turned to Bilbo. ‘He is very handsome, isn’t he, dear?’ She winked at her son. To Thorin’s surprise, small red patches appeared on Bilbo’s cheeks.

‘Mum!’ he said. ‘Behave!’

Mrs Baggins smiled wickedly, and this time she winked at Thorin, who didn’t know where to look from embarrasment.

‘I...I’ll start in the kitchen then?’ he stammered, hastily retreating there. He was rummaging in the cleaning closet when he heard music from the living room. Vivaldi. Humming along fragments of the Four Seasons quietly, he started to clear out the first kitchen cabinet he was supposed to clean. 

‘Time for tea I think!’ The cheery voice interrupted Thorin’s work. He turned around. Bilbo Baggins stood in the doorway, hands on his hips, head tilted. Thorin’s breath hitched at the sight of him in his cream shirt and dark red waistcoat. Bilbo smiled, then walked to the stove to fill an old-fashioned kettle. 

‘What have you managed to do so far?’ he asked. 

Thorin pointed at the one cabinet he had finished and the second one he had just started with. Bilbo frowned. Thorin cast down his eyes. 

‘I’m sorry,’ he said. Blast, he had fallen into his old trap again. He heard Bilbo open the cabinet doors.

‘Wow,’ he said. ‘You are amazingly thorough.’ When Thorin looked up he saw Bilbo’s friendly face. 

‘Sorry,’ said Thorin again. I tend to lose myself in the details, he wanted to say, but he never quite knew how to talk to people outside his job, especially people like Bilbo Baggins.

‘It’s fine,’ said Bilbo. He was putting three teacups and saucers on a tray. ‘There’s no hurry, really.’

Thorin sat down gingerly on the couch next to Mrs Baggins. She had insisted that he sit with her, and she immediately put her hand through his arm and cuddled against him. Thorin froze. As a general rule people didn’t touch him other than shaking his hand. He had no clue how to react.

‘Oh, you’re so big,’ crooned mrs Baggins. ‘Bagginses have always been small. Bilbo is small too.’ She looked at her son. ‘Well, short anyway.’

Bilbo choked on a sip of tea, turning red.

‘Mum!’

Thorin kept his gaze on his tea cup, trying to ignore Mrs Baggins’ touch. He thought Bilbo looked just fine, the fact that he was a little on the chubby side only added to his attractiveness. He tried desperately to keep from blushing again. Was he destined to have a red face in this house all the time? He tried to remember the last page of the books he had been working on this morning. Numbers always calmed him.

‘So nice of you to visit us,’ Mrs Baggins said. ‘I am afraid my husband is out at the moment, but when he returns you can have a glass of brandy with him.’

‘I don’t drink,’ Thorin said, without thinking. Of course he just had to catch Bilbo arching an eyebrow at him. ‘I don’t,’ he added defensively.

‘Nonsense,’ said Mrs Baggins. ‘There’s nothing wrong with one small glass.’

Thorin released her hand from his arm, leaned forward and put his cup on the coffee table.

‘I better start working again,’ he said.

‘But you have only just arrived,’ complained Mrs Baggins. ‘Bungo will be so disappointed.’

Thorin stood up.

‘I’ll finish that second cupboard before I leave,’ he said in Bilbo’s direction, without looking at him.

But when he arrived in the kitchen and leaned on the sink for a moment to collect his thoughts, a soft voice suddenly said, quite close:

‘What happened?’

He turned around to find Bilbo standing in front of him.

‘I..’ He found it difficult to think with those eyes fixed upon him. Then they blinked rapidly.

‘Sorry, I have no right to ask. Please forgive me.’ Bilbo turned around to leave the kitchen.

‘Someone spiked my orange juice at an office party,’ Thorin blurted out. ‘The new secretary thought I needed to loosen up. I didn’t really notice, the music was so loud and there were so many people. I felt like I was going to be sick so I left. In my car.’ He tried to catch his breath. ‘I hate pop music,’ he added, not realising the non sequitur until he had said it.

When there was just silence, he dared to look up. He couldn’t interpret the expression on Bilbo’s face, but it wasn’t anger, that he was sure of. Then the other man smiled.

‘You’re really...’

‘Odd, I know,’ said Thorin quickly. He didn’t want to hear Bilbo say it.

‘I was going to say... nice,’ said Bilbo, but his hesitation made Thorin think he had meant to say something else.

‘I’m sorry,’ Thorin said, wincing as he realised how often he had said those words to Bilbo already. ‘If you want, I will ask them to assign me to another house.’

‘No!’ The vehemence in those words took him by surprise. ‘No, umm, my mother really likes you and you work very neatly, if you want you can stay here for your whole sentence, I mean, do all your hours here. If you want.’ Bilbo inhaled audibly. ‘Do you do ironing? I bet you would be amazing at ironing. Nobody does ironing anymore it seems.’

‘I do,’ Thorin confessed. He liked ironing, he liked how he could remove all wrinkles from the garments, and make them all smooth and crisp.

‘I knew you would.’ The corners of Bilbo’s eyes crinkled in a very appealing way. ‘When is your next shift? Tuesday again? Could you do the ironing then?’

‘Of course,’ Thorin nodded. They stared at each other for a moment. There was that strange feeling in his belly again. ‘I better...’ he pointed at the kitchen cabinet.

‘Yes, sure,’ said Bilbo. ‘I’m ...’ He pointed his thumb in the direction of the living room.

Thorin nodded, turned around, went back to his cabinet. But he was very aware of the fact that it seemed Bilbo to take a little while to actually leave the kitchen.

***********************

On Tuesday, Thorin did the ironing, a large heap of it. He only saw Bilbo in passing when he arrived, receiving a tired smile from him. Why did he seem so tired? Bilbo hadn’t put anything but the ironing on his list of tasks, but Thorin hoovered the living room and cleaned the toilet anyway. He wasn’t quite finished when mrs Proudfoot arrived at ten minutes past twelve, but it didn’t matter. He didn’t have to be at the office until one o’clock, so there was still time. When he finally left at half past, he had to rush, and skipped his lunch.

On Friday afternoon he was disappointed to find that Bilbo didn’t have the afternoon off like he had last week. Mrs Gamgee, who had kept mrs Baggins company until Thorin arrived, left in a fluster of hurried goodbyes, shouting something about Bilbo probably being a little late today. Thorin stared at her back, then closed the door behind him.

It was already nearing five, Thorin was wistling along with the [Pastoral Symphony ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iQGm0H9l9I4>) which he had put in the CD player for mrs Baggins, while mopping the kitchen floor. 

‘Beethoven, eh?’ said an amused voice behind him. Thorin turned around, spraying dirty soap water from the mop as he swirled it with him.

‘Watch it!’ Bilbo jumped aside, narrowly preventing his crisp beige trousers from being showered in filthy drops.

‘Sorry, sorry.’ Thorin quickly put down the mop. God, did he always have to act like a stupid oaf around this man?

‘No harm done,’ said Bilbo. ‘I’m sorry I kept you waiting. Did mrs Gamgee say I might be a little later than half four?’

‘She did,’ Thorin said. His eyes darted between Bilbo and the mop. ‘I should have done this earlier,’ he said, realising that the kitchen floor was wet now, and Bilbo would probably like to cook. 

‘I won’t cook as yet,’ Bilbo said, apparently knowing what he was thinking. ‘I would like some tea though, so ...’

‘There’s fresh tea in the pot in the living room,’ said Thorin.

‘There is?’

Thorin blushed.

‘I thought you might need it after work,’ he said awkwardly. ‘You always look so tired.’

Silence stretched between them.

‘I _am_ tired,’ Bilbo said, suddenly sounding weary. ‘You have no idea how tired I am, Thorin.’

Thorin looked at him. The handsome face had sagged, no smile or crinkles to be seen. Thorin had to fight the sudden urge to put his arms around the man and hold him until he wasn’t so tired and sad anymore.

‘Is there anything I can do to help?’ he asked instead. 

‘If you know of a way to find a large sum of money...’ said Bilbo with a small smile.

‘I _am_ an accountant,’ said Thorin.

After a moment of surprise, Bilbo started to laugh, a real laugh. Thorin smiled at the idea that he had caused it. He would like to make him laugh more often.

‘What do you need it for?’ he asked, surprised by his own boldness.

Bilbo chuckled.

‘For a dream,’ he said. ‘Just a dream. Come and have a cuppa after you finished the floor.’

‘Alright,’ said Thorin. Bilbo seemed a little less weary, he was glad about it.

‘Here.’ Bilbo handed him a cup of tea and Thorin sat down. Luckily Bilbo was sitting next to his mother on the couch, so she wouldn’t be able to latch herself to his arm again. The old lady was dragging her finger over a page in a large notebook.

‘This is lovely handwriting,’ she murmured. ‘But where are the pictures?’

‘No pictures, mum,’ Bilbo said. ‘There is a new chapter though. I will read it to you after dinner.’

Thorin was curious, but he daren’t ask. He sipped his tea and took a bite from his biscuit. When he looked up, he saw Bilbo’s eyes on him.

‘This is part of the dream,’ he said, patting the notebook. ‘I.. I’m writing a book.’

Thorin lowered his teacup, looking at Bilbo in awe.

‘You are?’ he said. 

‘It’s a children’s book. Well, for older children, like young teens. It’s an adventure.’

‘Wow,’ said Thorin. It sounded so creative. He wished he could be creative sometimes. ‘What is it about?’

‘A group of dwarves on a quest to fight a dragon,’ Bilbo said, for some reason avoiding Thorin’s eyes.

‘Sounds nice,’ Thorin said, not entirely truthful. He was used to reading classic literature, not fantasy novels, though he had to admit that his eyes had strayed in that direction once or twice while browsing in the bookstore. But it seemed so silly to indulge in unrealistic stories.

‘You hate it,’ stated Bilbo.

‘No!’ said Thorin. ‘No, I just don’t know anything about it.’

‘About dwarves? Or dragons?’ Now Bilbo sounded as if he was about to laugh.

‘Either,’ answered Thorin seriously. Bilbo chuckled at that and Thorin felt his unavoidable blush come up again.

‘I want to write books and own a bookstore,’ said Bilbo suddenly. ‘That’s the dream.’

‘It’s a wonderful dream,’ said Thorin, completely truthfully this time. He stared at the notebook still cradled in mrs Baggins’ hands. His mind was beginning to turn. Of course first of all you would have to find a store to buy or rent. You would need to compare prices, and make a business plan. Would banks be willing to loan money for this? What if Bilbo could find an investor? How much money would be needed? Apart from the shop itself, he would need to buy books, a lot of books. You can’t have a bookstore with just a few books in it. Maybe he could buy an existing bookstore? Stormcrow Books was a nice old-fashioned bookstore and mr Grey wasn’t very young anymore...

‘How about Stormcrow Books?’ he said. ‘I don’t know how old mr Grey is, but maybe he is ready to retire. It’s a nice store, with wood and everything. And it already has a lot of books.’

He waited for Bilbo to start laughing, but all that happened was Bilbo staring at him with his mouth open.

‘I mean, it’s in the city centre, that’s a nice location, isn’t it? Though...’ Thorin looked up at the ceiling, frowning. ‘It doesn’t seem very busy usually. I don’t know why.’ He inhaled as he tought about the idea a bit more. ‘I don’t know if he owns the whole building or just the shop. Maybe he lives above it. Would you want to live above your shop?’

Bilbo shut his mouth. The corners of it were twitching suspiciously.

‘I haven’t thought about that,’ he said in a strained voice.

‘You haven’t?’ Thorin frowned. ‘But you’ve had this idea for some time, right? I suppose it has pros and cons to live above the shop. There’s no commuting, but also you never get away from work. Would you want to get away from work if your work is your dream? Oh!’ He turned to Bilbo with wide eyes. ‘You wouldn’t have to arrange all these people taking care of your mother if your home is at your work!’

‘I...’ Bilbo was staring at him again. ‘I... if you say it like that...’

‘How much would a bookstore cost? Could you sell this house? Or is it rented? I could do calculations if you give me the numbers. I know about mortgages and such. Bank loans are quite expensive a the moment though, it would be better if you could find a private investor, someone who is sympathetic about the idea and would give you some leeway to start things up.’

‘Thorin, Thorin, stop!’ Bilbo held up his hands, his face contorted halfway between laughing and astonishment.

‘Why?’

‘Why?’ Bilbo waved his hands around in a rather silly way. It struck Thorin as adorable. And he promptly felt as if his tongue was paralyzed. ‘Because... because you make it sound ...’

‘Doable?’ Thorin managed to wring out around his paralyzed tongue. He had met young entrepreneurs before, people with dreams and all sorts of fears about actually realizing them. He had never completely understood about the dreams, but he knew a thing or two about possible ways to make them real. 

‘Well... yes,’ said Bilbo, sounding a bit helpless.

‘There are people who can help you set things up. I can help with finances and calculations, other people can help with finding a building, and a business plan etcetera.’

‘Will you read to me now, Bilbo dear?’ asked mrs Baggins.

‘I can’t do that, Thorin,’ said Bilbo, glancing at his mother. ‘I have to work, and care for my mother, and organize the sitters, and dinner, and mr Brandybuck wants me to go to Italy in november to buy fabrics, and he won’t take no for an answer. I just don’t know where to get the time and the energy.’ He buried his face in his hands. Thorin was once again overcome by the urge to go over to him and hold him. What was happening to him? He ran his hand through his hair, wondering what Bilbo’s curls would feel like. No, don’t think about that.

‘I’ll cook dinner,’ he blurted out. 

‘Oh!’ cried mrs Baggins. ‘We haven’t had shepherd’s pie in weeks!’

‘We had it yesterday, mum,’ said Bilbo absentmindedly, eying Thorin through his fingers.

‘I’m sure we didn’t,’ said mrs Baggins.

‘I can’t cook shepherd’s pie,’ said Thorin. 

Suddenly Bilbo burst out laughing. He laughed and laughed and laughed until it sounded almost hysterical, tears streaming from his eyes. Thorin got up and crouched in front of Bilbo. He lifted his hand, wanting to touch, but lost the nerve to actually do it.

‘Are you alright?’ he asked uncertainly.

Bilbo’s face emerged from his hands, red and wet with tears.

‘I’m sitting here with my mother who has Alzheimer’s and a house cleaning accountant on community service, talking about shepherd’s pie and my plans for a bookstore,’ he choked out. ‘I feel like I’m in a surreal film!’

Thorin felt slapped in the face. He had gotten it all wrong again it seemed. He started to get up, but a hand gripped his wrist.

‘No, don’t.’ Suddenly Bilbo’s arms were around his neck, a wet cheek pressed against his beard. ‘Oh god, Thorin, you’re such a breath of fresh air.’

‘I am?’ Thorin was certain that nobody had ever considered him anything of the sort. But then he forgot this train of thought as it penetrated his brain that he was being hugged by Bilbo Baggins. And that his own arms had somehow found their way around Bilbo’s shoulders. And that it felt uncommonly good.

‘Aren’t you going to kiss?’ asked mrs Baggins. 

They let go of each other immediately. Bilbo turned to his mother.

‘Oh, mum,’ he said, leaning in to give her a peck on the cheek. Thorin couldn’t see his face, couldn’t see if it was as red as his own no doubt was. He scrambled unto his feet and retreated to his chair, burying his nose in his teacup. 

If only. 

‘I better leave,’ he said when he felt he could trust his voice again.

‘I thought you were going to cook.’ Surprisingly it was Bilbo’s voice, not mrs Baggins’.

‘I...’ Thorin looked up. Bilbo was rubbing his face with his hands, looking at him with a smile. ‘Do you want me to?’

‘We will do it together. Unless you’ve changed your mind?’ 

‘No, no I haven’t.’ He hadn’t, had he? He was a bit tired, but really, he would like to spend more time with Bilbo and mrs Baggins.

‘Come on, it’ll be fun. It’s vegetable lasagna.’ 

How could he resist that smile?

Bilbo had put a CD in the player and his mother was humming along with Mozart’s violin sonatas while Thorin and Bilbo chopped up vegetables in the kitchen. They didn’t talk much, Thorin had no idea what to talk about. His mind would only provide suggestions about Bilbo’s bookstore, and he wasn’t sure Bilbo would welcome that subject. Suddenly they heard the sound of the front door slapping shut.

‘Oh fig!’ exclaimed Bilbo. ‘Watch the stove, Thorin!’ And he dashed out of the kitchen.

It was only a few minutes before Thorin heard voices in the hallway. He glanced into the living room and saw Bilbo and his mother enter.

‘No, really mum, I bought the groceries yesterday, we have everything we need. Come see for yourself.’ He looked up at Thorin, his face tired once more.

‘Dinner is almost ready to go into the oven, Mrs Baggins,’ Thorin said. ‘All the vegetables have been cut, and there’s grated cheese and tomato sauce.’ He opened the fridge door. ‘If you’re very hungry, I could make you a few crackers with cheese.’

‘Well now, that’s a nice offer, isn’t it, mum?’ 

‘I’m not that hungry,’ stated Mrs Baggins haughtily. ‘I can wait until dinner is ready.’ With that she turned around. Bilbo followed her with his eyes until he was apparently satisfied. Then he turned to Thorin and smiled a sad little smile.

‘That’s why I can’t leave her alone, you know,’ he said. ‘Sometimes she goes outside. Last time I had to go pick her up at a bakery halfway through town. At least she remembered where I work so they could call me.’

‘I’m sorry,’ Thorin said.

‘Nah,’ said Bilbo, straightening his back. ‘It’s just how it is. Let’s put that lasagna in the oven.’

***************

Thorin walked out of the conference room behind his boss and the new clients. He’d had trouble concentrating during the meeting. His thoughts kept straying back to the dinner he had shared with Bilbo and his mother. Somehow talk had come easy once they had sat down to eat. Mrs Baggins talked about her childhood, Bilbo made them laugh with stories about his year at a fashion academy in Milan and Thorin, when faced with two pairs of big, pleading blue eyes, shyly shared bits and pieces about growing up in the countryside.

‘My word, Durin, where on earth did you dig up the fairy?’ One of his least favourite colleagues, Dain, was staring at him with a mocking smile on his face.

‘Fairy?’ Thorin looked around, half expecting a lady in a ballgown and wings.

‘The pansy.’ Dain jerked his head in the direction of the client waiting room with its large windows. Thorin’s eyes opened wide when he saw the short man pacing there, muttering to himself and moving his arms around. It couldn’t be. Why on earth would Bilbo Baggins be here at Erebor Accountancy? Then he frowned.

‘Pansy?’ he asked.

Dain rolled his eyes.

‘God, Durin, sometimes I think you’re from another planet. The sissy. The _homosexual_.’ He said the word slowly, putting emphasis on each syllable. 

‘You mean Mr Baggins?’

‘If that’s his name. Don’t tell me you didn’t notice. Even you can’t be this blind.’

‘I have no idea what you are talking about,’ said Thorin. Could people see from the outside if someone was gay? Could they see... 

‘Incredible,’ sighed Dain. ‘The way he moves his hips, his hands, the way he _talks_. It’s obvious to anyone. Except you it seems.’ He chuckled. ‘Anyway, he asked specifically for you, so you better not keep him waiting any longer. He might faint.’ And with that he walked away, still laughing.

Thorin moved his shoulders, as if to remove something unpleasant from them, and hurried to the waiting room.

‘Bilbo?’

‘Thorin!’ Bilbo rushed to him, stopping only just in time not to collide with him. His arms were raised, but he let them fall to his sides again. ‘I’m so sorry to bother you here, but it’s mum.’

‘What is it?’ Thorin was immediately worried. ‘Is she ill?’

‘No, she’s gone and I can’t find her.’ Bilbo’s voice raised to a high note and then broke into a sob. ‘She’s been gone for at least three hours, and we’ve been looking everywhere, but she’s just gone. I...maybe I have to start calling the hospitals...’ He started waving his hands around.

Instinctively Thorin grabbed those hands, forcing him to go still.

‘Calm down,’ he said, his voice low. ‘Don’t panic. I will come with you.’

Bilbo’s frightened eyes went up to his face, tears were threatening to fall out.

‘Really?’

‘Of course. Let me take my coat.’

‘But your work...’

‘It can wait.’ Thorin walked to his office, grabbed his coat and personal things, and headed back to the waiting room. Bilbo was still standing there, as if he hadn’t moved at all.

‘Let’s go,’ Thorin said. Bilbo followed him through the dark oak-panelled hall. 

‘Going somewhere, Durin?’ called out Dain.

‘Yes,’ he answered curtly. ‘I don’t know when I’ll be back.’ He held the door open so Bilbo could pass through.

‘Have fun!’ said Dain in a sing-song voice.

Outside Thorin took a deep breath to adapt to the brightness of the sun and the fact that something quite outside the normal routine was happening.

‘Okay,’ he said, turning to Bilbo. ‘Tell me.’

‘Mrs Gamgee was sitting with mum, but she was tired and dozed off. When she woke up, my mother was gone. She phoned Mrs Proudfoot and they walked around the immediate neighbourhood and when they couldn’t find her, they called me. I took my mother’s bike and went around in increasingly wider circles but she is nowhere!’ Bilbo rand both hands through his very messed-up curls. Without thinking Thorin put his hand on Bilbo’s shoulder.

‘Where does she normally go?’

‘Uhm,’ Bilbo closed his eyes. He seemed to lean into Thorin’s touch slightly. ‘There are a number of shops, she wasn’t there and they promised to call if she shows up.’

‘So, she tends to go shopping? Are there any shops further away that she likes? Could she have gone to Took-Brandybuck to visit you?’

Bibo frowned.

‘That seems unlikely. Besides, they would call me.’ He dug up his mobile and checked to see if he had missed any messages. Apparently he hadn’t.

‘Alright,’ said Thorin. ‘Let me think.’ Thinking was something he could do. Think logically. Where would someone like mrs Baggins go? ‘She likes music, could she have gone to a music store, or a concert or something?’

‘It’s possible, I suppose.’ Bilbo sounded unconvinced. ‘She used to like the theatre but hasn’t been there in ages.’

‘What else is on her mind?’ asked Thorin. ‘Generally speaking, and specifically lately?’

‘Uh, my father, her mother, umm, shepherd’s pie for some reason, my story, uh, you.’ 

‘Me?’ 

Bilbo nodded, cheeks more flushed than before.

‘She seems to like you a lot.’

‘Well, she isn’t here,’ said Thorin, looking back at the building, frowning. ‘Assuming she even knows I work here.’

‘I don’t think she does,’ said Bilbo. He looked up at Thorin expectantly. Thorin realized his hand was still on Bilbo’s shoulder. For a moment he considered removing it, but then decided not to. Bilbo didn’t seem to mind.

‘So, shepherd’s pie. Well, I don’t think that helps, she wasn’t at the shops. How about your book?’

‘What about it? Do you think she’s gone to find a dragon?’ Bilbo’s eyes flashed a shimmer of humour.

‘Would she?’ asked Thorin seriously. 

‘I don’t know.’ Bilbo looked at him curiously. 

‘What?’

‘Nothing. You take her so seriously.’

Thorin frowned.

‘Of course I do, why wouldn’t I?’

‘Not many people do,’ said Bilbo quietly. ‘Even the neighbours...’

‘Let’s not dwell on that now,’ said Thorin, squeezing his shoulder lightly. ‘We need to find her first. What does she say about your book?’

‘She says it should be a proper book with pictures.’ He smiled. ‘She said I should sell it in my shop.’

‘Your shop?’

‘Yes. Oh, that’s another thing she’s been talking about since the other day, when I told you about it.’

‘Hmm.’ Something niggled on Thorin’s brain. Suddenly an idea came to him. ‘Does she know Stormcrow Books?’

‘Yes,’ said Bilbo slowly. ‘Yes! We used to buy children’s books there when I was young. Do you think...?’

‘It’s worth a try.’ 

Bilbo nodded, grabbed his phone, found the number on the internet and called the bookstore. After only a few words with Mr Grey, he looked up at Thorin with a blinding smile.

A cab brought them to Stormcrow Books at the other side of town in twenty minutes. Bilbo dashed out, leaving Thorin to pay the cabby, but he didn’t mind. When he entered the shop a minute later, he found Bilbo hugging his mother while Mr Grey looked at them with a smile.

‘Well, hello Mr Durin,’ the elderly shopkeeper greeted him. ‘Are you acqainted with this charming lady?’

‘You watch it, young man,’ said mrs Baggins sternly, removing herself from Bilbo’s embrace and shaking a finger at mr Grey. ‘Giving me tea and biscuits does not mean you are allowed to take liberties.’

‘I wouldn’t dream of it, my dear lady.’

‘We were talking about your book, sweetheart,’ said Mrs Baggins, turning around to Bilbo and catching sight of Thorin. ‘Oh, there you are!’ she exclaimed. ‘You handsome thing! How good of you to come!’ She extended her hand to him and he felt obliged to take it. She pulled both men in mr Grey’s direction.

‘This is my son, the writer,’ she said, ‘and this is his boyfriend. Aren’t they a handsome couple?’

Thorin opened his mouth to protest, but nothing came out. Mr Grey nodded smiling.

‘Very handsome,’ he said.

‘No, we’re not...’ Bilbo started to say. ‘I mean, Thorin...’ He looked at Thorin as if seeking help, but Thorin found he could only stare and think what it would be like to be Bilbo’s boyfriend and oh dear what was he thinking and his face was becoming hot and why was Bilbo looking at him like that? Bilbo coughed.

Thorin felt as if awakening from a dream.

‘No, no we’re not ... boyfriends,’ he said hastily. ‘I’m just...’

‘A friend,’ said Bilbo. ‘He’s a friend. Mr Grey, thank you so much for taking care of my mother, I was very worried.’

‘It’s nothing, dear boy. I believe this belongs to you?’ He handed Bilbo the large notebook that contained his story. ‘Your mother asked me to publish it but I’m afraid I’m just a bookseller.’

Thorin pursed his lips together to stop himself from asking if Mr Grey was thinking about retiring.

‘I have to return to work,’ he said instead. Bilbo turned to him, smiling

‘Of course,’ he said. ‘I hope your boss won’t be angry.’

‘I hope so t...’ But Thorin’s words were cut off when Bilbo suddenly threw his arms around his neck and planted a kiss on his cheek.

‘Thank you so much,’ Bilbo whispered. Then he let go of Thorin after looking in his eyes for a moment as if searching for something. 

Thorin was in a bit of a daze while he walked out and hailed a taxi to take him back to the office.

*********************

Although he saw Bilbo shortly when he arrived at the Baggins’ house the next morning, the rest of the week dragged on endlessly. Thorin found himself thinking about his new friend, and especially the hug and kiss, every moment his mind wasn’t occupied with his work. At night he sat in his flat, surrounded by his bookshelves and listening to Bach or Beethoven, not being able to concentrate on the book he was currently reading. [‘Oblomov’](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Oblomov) seemed to have lost all its appeal in favour of blue eyes in a sweet face surrounded by dark blond curls. When Friday finally came, Thorin wasn’t sure if he was happy or apprehensive at the thought of Bilbo being home that afternoon. Until he realised that he wasn’t at all sure that Bilbo would be off today. 

Bilbo was home. He opened the door to Thorin with a happy smile.

‘Come in, come in!’ he chanted. ‘Let me take your coat and go right in!’ 

A little bewildered, Thorin did as asked. In the living room he found Mrs Baggins sitting in her usual chair, beaming at him. On the coffee table in front of her was a large dish with a selection of pastry. The large tea pot was there too, surrounded by three cups.

‘Sit, sit,’ said Bilbo gesturing at the couch. Thorin sat down. Bilbo perched on the edge of the couch, taking a pastry dish in one hand and cocking his head at Thorin.

‘What do you like?’ he asked. ‘There’s apple pie, Bakewell pudding, Chorley cake, and strawberry pie.’

‘Bilbo baked the apple and strawberry pies,’ Mrs Baggins declared. Bilbo blushed.

‘I...I...’ Thorin stuttered. He wasn’t really very fond of pastry, it was too sweet for his taste. But how could he refuse without insulting Bilbo? He didn’t want to cause Bilbo any discomfort.

‘I’m guessing you’re not much of a sweet tooth, are you?’ asked Bilbo. When Thorin didn’t react, Bilbo nudged him with his elbow. ‘Am I right?’

Thorin nodded.

‘I made the apple pie with only half the amount of sugar,’ said Bilbo, sounding just a little smug. ‘But there are also sandwiches in the kitchen if you prefer that.’

‘There’s salmon and cheese,’ added mrs Baggins.

‘Apple pie,’ said Thorin. If Bilbo baked that especially for him, he was certainly going to try it, if only to make him happy. And when Bilbo flashed him a smile, he was glad he made that choice. It slowly sank in. Bilbo baked him apple pie. He realised he was smiling rather stupidly, but he didn’t seem able to stop doing it.

‘So,’ said Mrs Baggins when they were all sitting with their tea and pastry. ‘What’s the occasion? Is it your birthday, Tim?’

‘Thorin, mum,’ said Bilbo. ‘And no, it’s not his birthday. At least,’ he threw Thorin a look. ‘I don’t think so. Is it?’

Thorin shook his head, still smiling stupidly.

‘My birthday is in July,’ he said.

‘We’re thanking Thorin because he helped find you when you were lost, mum.’

‘Lost? I never get lost, thank you very much! I have lived in this town since I was born, I know every nook and cranny.’ 

‘Of course, mum.’

Mrs Baggins still looked cross. She had put her dish on the coffee table.

‘This apple pie is lovely,’ said Thorin, and he meant it. It was a little sour, not too sweet at all. It earned him another radiant smile from Bilbo and his heart jumped a little in his chest. 

‘Did you teach Bilbo how to bake, Mrs Baggins?’

‘Of course I did!’ This set Mrs Baggins off on a tale of baking in the old days, her anger quite forgotten. Bilbo leaned back on the couch, sitting close enough for Thorin to feel the heat of his body. It was quite distracting.

What was even more distracting were the little glances Bilbo seemed to cast at him occasionally. Thorin had no idea how to react to that, so he ignored them, although his collar seemed at least a size too small at the moment.

When they had all finished their pastry and their second cup of tea, Thorin cleared his throat.

‘I should start my work,’ he said. ‘What do you want me to do today?’

‘Ironing,’ said Bilbo. 

Oh good, he could blame his heated face on the iron the rest of the afternoon. And didn’t that come in handy, since Bilbo had decided to go through a number of drawers in the living room, which apparently required him to bend over quite a lot right in Thorin’s line of vision. It was excruciating. For some reason Mrs Baggins was in a particularly jolly mood. She was knitting a very brightly coloured scarf, looking up regularly at either Bilbo or Thorin and chuckling quietly.

‘I talked to Mr Grey,’ Bilbo said suddenly. ‘I called him this morning to ask if he had any advice on how to start my own bookshop.’

Thorin looked up sharply.

‘That is fantastic,’ he said enthousiastically. ‘What did he say?’

‘Well, it turns out he isn’t quite ready to retire yet.’

Thorin’s face fell.

‘But.’ Bilbo smirked at him. ‘He would not mind having a successor lined up and he is looking into the possibility to hire me for two or three mornings or afternoons a week. To learn the ropes so to say. And if it all works out, I might be able to buy him out in a few years.’

Thorin stared at Bilbo until he sensed a burning smell and Bilbo cried: ‘Watch it!’

He yanked the iron off the blouse he had been ironing. A brown burn marred the pretty flower pattern. Mortified, Thorin traced the spot with his finger.

‘It’s ruined,’ he said softly.

‘I guess it is,’ said Bilbo, unexpectedly close. When Bilbo’s hand, reaching down to touch the burned blouse, brushed against Thorin’s, Thorin jerked his hand away, startled. Bilbo froze. There was a short silence.

‘Nothing to be done about it,’ Bilbo said nonchalantly, moving away. ‘Don’t worry about it, mother has lots more.’

Thorin clenched his hands together, not wanting Bilbo to see that they were shaking slightly. He felt like a complete fool. He abandoned the ironing and fled to the kitchen to see if he could find something to do there. He leaned his hands on the cool granite counter, exhaling.

‘Thorin?’ Bilbo’s voice was quiet and uncertain. Thorin’s heart jumped in his chest. He turned slowly, to see Bilbo standing in the doorway. Thorin gave him a faint smile, but Bilbo looked unhappy. Sad maybe, or something else. As if making a decision, he straightened and walked toward Thorin until he was standing in front of him.

‘I am sorry, Thorin, but I have to know. It’s too difficult.’

Difficult? What could be difficult? Bilbo looked up at him with those deep blue eyes. 

‘I suppose you have gathered that I am gay?’ Bilbo asked.

‘I... yes, I thought...’ Hoped. ‘... you might be.’ 

Bilbo eyed him intensely.

‘I apologize for being so blunt, but I am at a loss with your mixed signals,’ he said softly.

Signals? What was he talking about? Thorin had difficulty thinking with Bilbo’s gaze directed at him. He blinked.

‘Thorin,’ Bilbo hesitated for a moment. ‘Are you gay?’

Thorin swallowed.

‘Yes,’ he said. His voice sounded all wrong.

‘And are you ... okay with being gay?’

There was a rushing in his ears.

‘Yes.’ He was, but this was the first time he had ever said anything about it to anyone.

‘But why...’

‘I’m just really shy,’ blurted Thorin. ‘Really, ridiculously shy.’ And as if on command he blushed furiously.

Bilbo’s face seemed to melt into relaxation. He raised his hand and cupped Thorin’s jaw, rubbing his thumb across his beard.

‘Thorin.’ There were little brown specks in the blue of Bilbo’s eyes, it was beautiful. 

‘I never know what to do,’ babbled Thorin. ‘With people and ... and things. I always get it wrong.’

Suddenly that thumb was pressed to his lips.

‘Shh,’ said Bilbo. ‘I would very much like to kiss you. Is that alright?’

The rushing in his ears became so loud that he couldn’t hear anything else. Dumbly he nodded. And then soft lips pressed against his, moist and warm. So lovely. He just let it happen. Until somehow his body knew what to do. As he closed his arms around Bilbo, a soft moan escaped his throat. The lips retreated, but before he could protest, they were back, more insistant this time. And he kissed back, tasting the warm wetness of Bilbo’s mouth, feeling his soft chubbiness against his own body, and a shudder overtook him from his head down to his toes.

‘Oh god, Bilbo,’ he managed to whisper when they parted for air. He tried not to crush him but he wasn’t sure he succeeded, the need to hold him close was so strong.

‘Oh you beautiful, beautiful man,’ sighed Bilbo. His embrace was tight and it made Thorin feel wanted.

They kissed again and again. Thorin wanted to stay there, in Bilbo’s kitchen, in Bilbo’s arms, forever.

‘Let me hold you,’ said Thorin when they stopped kissing. ‘Let me just hold you and make your sorrow go away.’

Bilbo removed his hands from Thorin’s waist. He felt lost for a moment, until they closed around his face. Bilbo looked up at him almost nose to nose.

‘You are such a sweetheart,’ Bilbo said softly. ‘Such an adorable sweetheart.’

Thorin didn’t think anyone had ever said something like that to him. He blinked, hardly able to believe what was happening. Bilbo chuckled.

‘You _are_ , my dear,’ he said. ‘And you can hold me any day, as long as I get to hold you too.’

Thorin nodded. It seemed like a brilliant idea. Bilbo laughed and hid his face in the crook of Thorin’s neck. Thorin held him, thinking how he would help Bilbo realise his dream. He dared even admit to having his own dream now. A dream all about the lovely man in his arms. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I researched a bit and I don’t think drunk driving would get community service in Britain (it is possible in my country), but , let’s just say this is an AU where in cases like Thorin’s, this sort of community service is a possibility...
> 
> I have worked with people with Alzheimer’s/dementia, but it was harder to write a character with that disease than I expected. I think it didn’t turn out completely true to life. I guess that’s what happens when you have a plotline rather than real life...
> 
> This is the very first modern story I ever wrote. I would love to hear what you think about it! (Would you like a sequel for example?)


	2. Dating

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Thorin slowly grows more confident as he and Bilbo date, encounter some anti-gay unpleasantness, have a talk with Mr Grey, and Thorin comes out to his co-workers. 
> 
> [The rating’s gone up to Teen+ because of the expanded topic of gay intolerance, mild swearing and mild reference to sex.]

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> More shamelessly fluffy Thilbo. What can I say, I enjoy writing it at least as much as reading it. Also more lovely naive Thorin and equally lovely sassy Bilbo. Enjoy!

On Saturday morning Thorin awoke at 7 o’clock just like he did every day, but something felt different today. For a few short moments he wondered why his heart seemed to flutter in his chest. Then he remembered Bilbo. He exhaled. Bilbo. He flung his arm over his eyes, suddenly unable to cope with the feelings that flooded him. Had it even been real? He remembered the feel of Bilbo’s body, his lips on his. Oh lord, he remembered that. And how Bilbo had kept touching him while they prepared dinner. Soft little touches in passing, a hand across his lower back, a brush against his fingers. Thorin’s cheeks heated up even from thinking about it. And then his own uncertain attempts. He groaned at the memory. The first time he had deliberately put his hand on Bilbo’s arm had felt both ridiculously terrifying and stupidly exciting. He had blushed and Bilbo had smiled at him in a way that made his insides sort of melt.

And after dinner they had sat on the couch, watching the news and not seeing much of it since Bilbo had sat so close that his arm and leg touched Thorin’s. And later he had taken Thorin’s arm and draped it over his shoulder while flashing him another smile. Thorin was certain he had spent the entire evening grinning like an idiot.

Then when Thorin had prepared to leave, not very late since Bilbo had to work the next day, Mrs Baggins had hugged him and given him a kiss on his cheek. He marvelled at how nice that had been, his own mother having been been dead for 17, no 18 years. And then Bilbo had kissed him in the hallway. And to his own surprise, he had been the one to kiss Bilbo in the doorway, blushing and not wanting to leave. Bilbo had smiled at him so sweetly, touched his face and said he’d miss him.

Thorin stared at the dark ceiling, only half believing it hadn’t all been a dream.

Suddenly he was startled by his mobile signalling he had received a text message. Surprised he sat up to grab it.

_I hope I didn’t wake you, but I just wanted to say good morning_

The silly grin was back on Thorin’s face.

**I was awake. Good morning to you too.**

He stared at the text. Could he say more? Could he say he liked last night? Loved it? Missed him? Wanted to see him today, this instant? Blushing although there was nobody to witness it, he pressed ‘send’.

_Good :-) Mum asks how you are_

**I’m fine** He hesitated, finger poised over the little keyboard on the screen, wondering what to add. He still wanted to say he missed Bilbo. Would Bilbo appreciate it, or would he just think Thorin was pushy or needy? While he was still hesitating, another ping indicated a new text.

_I miss you._

Oh thank god. Thorin’s relief was so huge he almost got tears in his eyes. He hastened to start his text anew.

**I miss you too. Tell your mother I’m fine and thanks for asking**

He felt there was more he wanted to say, but he wanted to answer quickly, so he sent it off.

_Wish I didn’t have to work today. Making breakfast just now. Mum is going to Mrs Gamgee today._

Even though he had been aware of it, it suddenly struck him how much Bilbo had to organize, and how much he had to rely on people to take care of his mother. How many hours did the neighbours and other people sit with Mrs Baggins each week? How did they all cope? Then he realized he hadn’t answered Bilbo yet and hastened to type a reply.

**Wish you weren’t working too.**

He immediately typed an additional message as well.

**What time are you off?**

It took a little while before an answer came. Bilbo was probably busy with breakfast.

_Why do you want to know? ;-)_

For a moment his fingers hovered over his phone, then he plunged in.

**I could cook**

And then:

**I looked up the recipe for shepherd’s pie**

The answer came immediately

_LOL!!!_

Thorin had no idea what that meant. But before he could worry about that, another one came:

_Mum is cheering. I don’t think you can back out now._

**I won’t. Though I can’t promise the result will be edible. What time can I come over?**

His hand actually trembled when he sent the message. Had he just invited himself to the Bagginses? Promised to cook something he had never cooked before? He rand a hand through his hair, wondering when he had become so bold. 

_I’ll be home around 5:45._

**I’ll be there.**

With a sigh he fell back on the bed.

_Great! I have to go now, leaving soon. See you tonight XXX_

Thorin frowned at the x’s. That was a strange sort of typo.

**I’ll bring the groceries. Have a nice day at work.**

_Not very likely...._

Thorin grinned. He wished he could give Bilbo a kiss to send him off to work as he remembered his mother always did when his father left in the morning. Hold on, that’s what the x’s were! He suddenly remembered two young interns at the office discussing the text one of them had received from her new lover and how many x’s he had typed. Quickly he typed: **XXX** , then hesitated. Could you send just x’s? Or did they have to be at the end of a message? He thought of Bilbo and decided he didn’t care. He pressed ‘send’.

Within a second he got a reply. It only held a smiley face.

 

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

 

‘Bilbo, is it true people can see if someone is gay?’ It was Sunday evening. They were sitting on the couch, arms around each other, while watching Downton Abbey. Thorin had whispered the question, feeling stupid asking it, but it had nagged him for a while now. After what Dain had said, he had begun imagining that his colleague might have been mocking him behind his back for years. It shouldn’t bother him, but it did.

Bilbo chuckled.

‘If that were true, I wouldn’t have had to ask you, now would I?’ he grinned.

‘Oh, right.’

Bilbo turned a curious face toward him.

‘Why are you asking?’

Thorin hesitated. He didn’t care to repeat Dain’s unkind words.

‘Something a colleague said, when you were at the office.’

‘I see.’ Bilbo reached out to run a finger across Thorin’s jaw. He did that a lot, he seemed to like his beard. ‘Well, I guess many people would assume *I’m* gay from looking at me.’

‘Oh.’ Thorin still didn’t really understand, but it felt stupid to admit it. He even wondered how he had dared ask it in the first place. Somehow he had trusted Bilbo wouldn’t make fun of him. Bilbo looked at him with a knowing smile.

‘I move and talk a bit differently than most men, more effeminate. You never noticed that about me?’

Thorin blushed. He knew Bilbo waited for him to react, but he didn’t know what to say. Or rather, he found it difficult to say what he did think.

‘Come on, out with it.’ Bilbo tugged on Thorin’s hair.

‘Well, yes. I just...’ Bilbo had been encouraging him to speak up and Thorin tried, but it was still hard to say things out loud. ‘... thinkyou’recute,’ he said quickly, rushing the sentence. 

Bilbo chuckled again.

‘Thank you, dear,’ he said, leaning in to give him a kiss. ‘I think you’re pretty cute yourself.’

‘You are both pretty and cute,’ said Mrs Baggins, who was now looking at them instead of the telly. 

‘Thank you, mum,’ said Bilbo, circling Thorin’s waist with his arms and hugging him close. Thorin was still getting used to Mrs Baggins’ direct or even blunt remarks, whereas Bilbo usually took them in his stride. He wondered if she’d always been like this, or that it was the Alzheimer’s.

‘I wouldn’t say Thorin is pretty, though,’ Bilbo said, studying him from up close. Before Thorin’s mind could dive into thoughts about how he looked, he continued: ‘He’s far too masculine for that. Handsome is a much better word. Or gorgeous.’

‘Hardly!’ protested Thorin. ‘Nobody ever looks at me twice.’

Bilbo threw his head back and laughed.

‘Oh darling, I am sure they do, you just don’t notice it.’

Thorin forgot to be embarrassed, because Bilbo had just called him darling, and he’d never have thought something like that would cause him to feel so warm inside.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

Thorin sat staring at his computer screen without seeing anything, cradling a mug of cold tea in his hands. The sound of a knock and the door opening jolted him from his reverie. One of the secretaries looked in.

‘Mr Throrson is asking for the Edoras account,’ she said. ‘You were to bring it to him at three.’

Thorin looked back at his screen. He hadn’t finished with the Edoras account. He put his mug down, at a loss what to do. He had never been late with his work before, ever. 

‘I..umm.’

The secretary looked at him with an almost shocked expression on her face. She was one of the older ones, had been with the firm for years.

‘Mr Durin?’

‘It’s not...’ He pushed his chair back. ‘I’ll go see him.’

Very nervous, he walked to the office of the owner of Erebor Accountants. He had failed his boss. What would happen now? Would he be reprimanded?

He knocked on the heavy oak door.

‘Come,’ said Mr Throrson’s harsh voice. ‘Durin. Have you got the Edoras account?’

Thorin took a deep breath.

‘No, sir, it’s not completely finished. I will have it ready for you within the hour.’

Mr Throrson leaned back in his chair, looking at Thorin with raised eyebrows.

‘Not finished? You?’

‘I’m sorry, sir.’

‘Well, I guess there’s a first for everything.’ Mr Throrson said, eying Thorin curiously. ‘Everything alright, Durin?’

‘Yes, sir.’ He could hardly explain that he had wasted time reliving every single kiss he had shared with Bilbo this weekend.

‘Well, in an hour then.’ The boss turned back to his computer, dismissing Thorin, who stared at him dumbfounded for a minute before leaving. That was all? He had been given another hour, without reproach?

He hastened back and finished the work in fifty minutes, taking it to his boss immediately. Walking back, he saw Dain slouching against the doorframe of the secretarial office. When he heard him coming, Dain looked over his shoulder and started to grin.

‘Well, well,’ he drawled. ‘That’s something new for sure.’ He smirked. ‘Durin not finishing his work three hours before the deadline? Surely the world must have come to an end!’

To Thorin’s dismay, Dain decided to walk along with him.

‘So, what happened? Had a wild weekend?’ Dain roared with laughter. When Thorin didn’t say anything, he shoved him with his elbow. ‘Found yourself a hottie to play with?’ Thorin wanted to stay calm and collected but to his horror he felt colour rise to his cheeks as memories of Bilbo’s lips and eyes flooded him.

‘No way!’ Dain exclaimed. ‘Durin’s got a girl!’

‘Stop it,’ hissed Thorin. ‘I simply have a headache.’

‘I bet,’ said Dain, wiggling his eyebrows. ‘So, where’d you meet her?’

‘I do not have a girl!’ said Thorin. ‘Now leave me to work.’ And with that he closed the door of his office in Dain’s face. As he sat down, resting his head in his hands, he heard Dain sing ‘Durin’s got a girl.’ He groaned. The man was an insufferable twelve-year-old. 

Suddenly his mobile pinged. He shot up to check his messages.

_Meeting Mr Grey over lunch tomorrow, want to come?_

Eyes gone wide, he frantically typed a reply.

**Of course! Where and when?**

_12.45 Stormcrow_

Oh no, he couldn’t make that. He was working at Bilbo and Mrs Baggins’ house until twelve and then he had to be back at work at one. After today he wouldn’t dare ask for an extra hour.

**I have to be in the office at one :-(**

Bilbo had explained the wondrous world of smileys to him.

He didn’t receive a reply for ten minutes. He was starting to think that Bilbo must be disappointed or even angry with him, when his mobile signalled.

_11.45 Stormcrow, Mrs Proudfoot will come at 11.15_

He stared at the little screen. Had Bilbo just rescheduled everybody so Thorin could be at the meeting? 

_Will sign off for your hours till 12 no worries ;-)_

Thorin smiled at his phone as if it was Bilbo himself.

**I’ll be there XXX**

_Thanks XOXO_

Now what on earth was XOXO? In a wave of inspiration Thorin googled it and blushed when he found out it meant ‘hugs and kisses.’ He remained having trouble concentrating on his work for the rest of the afternoon.

 

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

Thorin walked up to the door, the bouquet of flowers hidden behind his back. He was grinning already in anticipation of Bilbo’s surprise. Although they had talked on the phone for an hour the evening before, Thorin had decided that he wanted to see Bilbo this morning, so he had arrived half an hour early. He rang the bell. After a while he heard quick footsteps coming down the stairs. The door was jerked open and Bilbo shouted:

‘Finally! Where the hell.... Thorin?’ He was in his shirtsleeves, his hair was in disarray and his cheeks were flushed. ‘What time is it?’

‘Eight,’ said Thorin, a bit subdued.

‘Thank god! I thought it must be eight thirty already!’ He stared at Thorin. ‘Why are you so early?’

‘Surprise,’ said Thorin with an uncertain smile. ‘Not such a good idea I guess.’

Bilbo ran a hand through his hair.

‘It’s home care, they should have been here at seven thirty to help mum wash and dress and they haven’t showed up yet, so now I’m helping her and we haven’t even had breakfast yet.’ A bang sounded from upstairs.

‘Oh god, what now? I have to...’

‘Go!’ said Thorin. ‘I will make tea.’

‘Would you? You’re a darling!’ Bilbo started towards the stairs, then turned around on his heels back to Thorin, hooked an arm behind his neck and pulled him down for a quick kiss. Then he hastened up the stairs.

Thorin enjoyed the view until Bilbo disappeared on the first floor, took off his coat and went to the kitchen to make tea, but not before putting Bach’s ‘Air’ on repeat. The house could use something calming.

Fifteen minutes later Mrs Baggins and Bilbo came down the stairs. Thorin had just put the tea pot on the table. He had found toast, jam, butter, cheese, ham, sugar and milk.

‘Does anyone want porridge?’ he asked.

‘No thanks dear,’ said Mrs Baggins.

‘Toast is fine, love,’ said Bilbo. He had put on his waistcoat, a dark grey one today and his hair looked relatively neat. He checked his watch. 

‘I have to leave in fifteen minutes,’ he said. His cheeks were still heated, he looked stressed. 

‘That leaves fifteen minutes to sit, have tea and some toast,’ said Thorin. Bilbo glanced at him from under his lashes, and suddenly Thorin knew what he needed. He went over to him and took him in his arms without saying anything, just holding him close. Bilbo’s arms went around his waist and he melted into Thorin with a deep sigh. Thorin rocked him quietly in rhythm with the music. He felt the tension dissipate. After a few minutes, Bilbo raised his head.

‘Kiss me?’ he asked softly. Thorin complied, fitting his mouth over Bilbo’s, slowly savouring him. He smelled of soap and shaving cream. 

‘You taste good,’ murmured Bilbo. ‘Better than breakfast.’ Thorin chuckled.

‘You have to eat something, sweetheart,’ he said. Bilbo smiled, cocking his head. Thorin felt a blush rise on his cheeks. He had said it without thinking. He had never used endearments in his life.

‘I like that,’ said Bilbo, kissing him. Thorin immediately resolved to keep using it.

‘Did you bring the flowers?’ asked Mrs Baggins. Thorin had put them on the table in a jar he had found.

‘I did, Mrs Baggins. They’re for you.’

‘Ooh, thank you, dear. They are lovely.’ 

Bilbo reluctantly removed himself from Thorin’s arms to sit down. He managed to eat a piece of toast, flushing it down with his tea. And then Thorin got to send him off to work as he had imagined just two mornings ago. He looked after him with a goofy smile, lips still tingling, and having been instructed to give home care an earful if they ever showed up. 

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

Thorin stepped over the threshold of Stormcrow Books at exactly 11.45. Bilbo and Mr Grey were already seated at one of the two small wooden tables Mr Grey kept at the back. They both stood when Thorin approached. Mr Grey shook his hand.

‘Welcome, Mr Durin.’

‘Mr Grey.’

To his surprise and mild shock, Bilbo reached up and kissed Thorin lightly on the lips.

‘Thanks for coming,’ he whispered.

Thorin caught Mr Grey’s amused eyes.

‘A handsome couple after all?’ he enquired dryly. Thorin blushed while Bilbo grinned broadly.

‘Mr Grey,’ Thorin said, settling on his chair. ‘I think it is only fair to tell you that while I am here as Bilbo’s friend, I am also an accountant.’ 

‘I know that,’ said Mr Grey, nodding. ‘Mr Baggins told me. In fact, I have brought the books of the past two years for you to see.’ He patted on two old-fashioned ledgers. No computers for Mr Grey it seemed, which was to be expected.

‘Now, since we don’t have a lot of time, let’s get to the point,’ the old man said. ‘I have talked to my bookkeeper, and we agree that there isn’t a lot of room for an extra salary.’

‘I could...’ Bilbo started to say. Thorin knew he was going to offer working for free. Thorin felt that that would not be right and opened his mouth to interrupt when Mr Grey raised his hand.

‘Even as an apprentice I would want to pay you, it’s the right thing to do. And you are taking care of your mother as well. So, here is what I propose. I can hire you for a maximum of six hours a week. For a modest salary of course, you cannot expect the same pay as you receive at Took-Brandybuck.’

Thorin liked the directness of the man, he had not expected it. Apperently his face betrayed his thoughts, because Mr Grey threw him a look and said:

‘I may be old and old-fashioned, Mr Durin, but I am still a businessman. Of sorts anyway.’

Bilbo glanced at them both, chuckling.

‘Thorin is old-fashioned too, Mr Grey, I am sure he only appreciates it in others.’ He looked at the bookshop owner with a mischievous glitter in his eyes. ‘Do you know how he described your store?’

Thorin didn’t even remember what he had said, but he started to blush in advance.

‘He said it was a ‘nice store with wood and everything’.’ 

Yes, the blush had been warranted alright. 

‘I just meant...’ he started to splutter. Bilbo put his hand on his arm, his eyes warm.

‘I know what you meant, but you have to admit it sounds a bit funny.’

Well. Thorin looked around the shop with it’s wooden panelling, the large wooden shelves in the walls, the wooden book racks in the middle, the worn wooden flooring, the paned bay windows.

‘It’s true though,’ he said. ‘There is a lot of wood. It’s beautiful.’

‘Why, thank you, Mr Durin,’ said Mr Grey. ‘At least we old-fashioned men appreciate the beauty of it.’ He turned to Bilbo again. ‘Before we agree on anything, Mr Baggins, I have to be honest with you. Business is not booming for bookshops. Modern times aren’t kind to books of any kind, but especially the paper version of them. After we have discussed what we need to discuss, I emplore you to think this through very well. I would be very happy to welcome you as my future successor, but it wouldn’t make you a rich man exactly. Pray do not start this until you know exactly what you are getting yourself into.’

Bilbo’s face fell.

‘We will, Mr Grey,’ Thorin said, determined to find a way to make sure that Bilbo would have his dream and could live off it somehow. ‘I know how to go about this, and I know people who can help us. Help Bilbo.’

Mr Grey nodded.

‘The shop is closed on Mondays. I usually do administration in the morning and you are welcome to join me if you wish so you can learn the trade. This would be without pay, however. I am also closed on Sundays and on Friday mornings. If at all possible, I would prefer you to work on either Wednesday afternoon or on Saturdays.’

Bilbo was still looking a bit down and didn’t answer immediately. Thorin, looking at his sweet face, put his hand on Bilbo’s arm. 

‘You don’t have to decide now, sweetheart.’ He flushed. Oh god, he had just called Bilbo ‘sweetheart’ in front of Mr Gray. Face burning, he muddled on. ‘You will have to speak to Mr Brandybuck first too of course. See what the possibilities are.’ 

Bilbo nodded.

‘I should write this down,’ he said, producing a small notebook from his pocket. He started to jot down what Mr Grey had proposed. He seemed to have shrugged off the disappointment he had felt earlier. He explained that he didn’t think Saturday was a possibility since that was Took-Brandybuck’s busiest day of the week. Bilbo and Mr Grey talked some more and Thorin mostly listened. He realised he needed to stay in the background. This was Bilbo’s dream and however much he felt the urge to protect Bilbo and do everything for him, that was not the way to go, assuming Bilbo would even let him. He did notice how Bilbo turned to him every now and then, seeking his opinion. 

When it was time for Thorin to leave, they had covered a number of important subjects and resolved to meet again the week after, on Friday afternoon, to see if they could come to an agreement. Thorin took the books with him. Bilbo could spare a bit more time on his extended early lunchtime, so he stayed with Mr Grey after sending Thorin off with a hug and a serious kiss that left Thorin all flustered, although Mr Grey had politely looked away.

Thorin managed to sneak in several relevant internet searches during work that afternoon. He was going to make sure that Bilbo could make an informed decision.

 

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

‘I’m so sorry, sirs.’ The waiter sounded apologetic. ‘I have to ask you to be, ah, more discreet. There have been a few ... comments.’

Thorin looked at him, uncomprehending. The waiter’s eyes went to where their fingers were entwined on the table.

‘I don’t understand,’ said Thorin. He felt Bilbo tugging on his hand.

The waiter bowed closer.

‘Your hands, sir,’ he said quietly. ‘I am sorry.’

‘Oh.’ Thorin reluctantly let go of Bilbo. ‘My apology, I wasn’t aware it was ...’ His eyes strayed to the couple at the table next to them, who were holding hands and staring deeply into each other’s eyes. He frowned. His sharp eyes went around the restaurand and found two more couples visibly holding hands.

‘Excuse me, but ...’

‘Yes, we understand,’ Bilbo interrupted him. ‘I assume our main course will be here shortly?’

‘Of course, sir.’ The waiter nodded at both of them and left hurriedly.

Thorin looked at Bilbo.

‘I don’t understand,’ he said. ‘He hasn’t said anything to the other people holding hands.’

‘Shh, I know. Just leave it, dear,’ said Bilbo with a smile. ‘It doesn’t matter.’

Thorin sat silently for a while, watching the couple next to them.

‘It does matter,’ he said finally. ‘I liked holding your hand and I don’t understand why we can’t when they can.’

Bilbo’s smile was a bit sad.

‘We’ll just choose a different restaurant next time,’ he said.

‘But this is a good restaurant, our firm takes clients here all the time.’

‘You’ve been here before?’ Bilbo’s eyes were wide. ‘They know you here?’

‘Of course, that’s why I know it’s good, and why I was able to book a table at short notice.’ Thorin didn’t understand why Bilbo was looking at him with such an adoring expression on his face.

‘Oh darling,’ Bilbo sighed. ‘It may not have been the wisest choice, but it definitely shows you are okay being out with me.’

Thorin frowned at him.

‘Of course I’m okay with taking you out, otherwise I wouldn’t be doing it.’

Bilbo chuckled.

‘I meant being out, out.’ 

‘It’s not a secret,’ said Thorin. Of course, he had been apprehensive about taking Bilbo on their first real date, though Bilbo had argued that having tea or taking a walk around the park during lunch were dates too, and even cooking dinner at home. But Thorin knew that this was the real thing, taking your date to a restaurant. He wanted it to be perfect. He would have liked to go to a concert or the theatre as well, but they couldn’t stay out late while Mrs Baggins spent the evening at the house of Bilbo’s cousins Drogo and Primula. 

Suddenly he noticed Bilbo’s amused eyes on him. His boyfriend – boyfriend! – was quietly humming, winking at him. The melody sounded vaguely familiar. Bilbo leaned close and sang softly in his ear.

_‘I wanna hold your ha-ha-hand, I wanna hold your hand.’_

Thorin didn’t like popmusic, but he had at least heard of The Beatles. He chuckled. Bilbo reached for him below the table.

‘I still don’t understand, though,’ said Thorin, squeezing his hand.

‘Can we just leave it?’

‘If that’s what you want.’ It was hard for Thorin to let something go without understanding it.

‘Yes,’ said Bilbo, with that irresistible smile.

‘Okay,’ said Thorin.

They enjoyed the rest of their meal without holding hands, though they occasionally touched below the table. Bilbo agreed that the food was very good, but Thorin had a feeling that something still wasn’t sitting right with him. He couldn’t help glancing at the other people in the restaurant. The couple next to them had left, but there were still other couples who occasionally held hands or even kissed. Then when Bilbo giggled rather loudly at something, Thorin noticed the irritated glare they received from a man a few tables to the left where he was seated with a woman and two children. Bilbo cocked his head at Thorin, looking very cute with his cheeks rosy from the wine and suddenly Thorin was reminded of the words Dain had used, and then the reason why they had been asked to be ‘discreet’ hit him with crystal clarity. He realised that the other couples in the restaurant had all consisted of a man and a woman. How could he have been so dense? Anger uncoiled in his stomach. He put down his glass of water and stared at his empty plate, trying to take even breaths. He had been hot-tempered at times as a child, but he thought he had conquered that many years ago.

‘Thorin?’

He didn’t look up, he didn’t think he could face Bilbo now. Closing his eyes he clawed in the expensive napkin lying on the table. A hand covered his fist.

‘It’s not fair,’ he said through clenched teeth. ‘Not fair.’

‘No, it’s not.’ The hand stroked his fist softly.

‘Unjust.’

‘I know, sweetie, let it go, please.’

He didn’t answer, tried to keep on breathing.

‘Would you like dessert, gentlemen?’

The waiter’s voice sounded perfectly professional.

‘No thank you,’ said Bilbo. ‘Could we have the check, please?’ 

‘Of course, sir.’

Thorin opened his eyes.

‘Don’t you want dessert?’ he asked in a strained voice. It was supposed to have been the perfect date.

‘Not now,’ said Bilbo with a sweet smile, his hand still on Thorin’s. ‘Maybe we could get a coffee somewhere along the way.’

‘Okay,’ said Thorin. ‘I’m so sorry.’

‘No, oh no, dear, you have nothing to apologize for.’ 

Thorin’s eyes strayed to the table with the man who had glared at them earlier. His fist clenched again when he saw the man in an obviously somewhat heated discussion with a waiter, casting glances in his and Bilbo’s direction. Bilbo had noticed him tensing up and followed his line of sight. When he saw the man, his eyes narrowed.

Thankfully their waiter returned with the check almost immediately. Thorin pulled his hand from Bilbo’s to grab the check, while reaching for his wallet. He was digging up his credit card when the waiter said quietly:

‘You will notice that the drinks are on the house.’

‘What?’ Thorin glanced at the check. It contained only their starters and the main course. He looked at Bilbo, who smiled at the waiter.

‘Thank you,’ Bilbo said.

‘We are very sorry for any inconvenience, Mr Durin,’ said the waiter, taking Thorin’s credit card and swiping it through the machine. Thorin signed the receipt quickly, wanting to leave as soon as possible.

‘We hope to see you back soon, Mr Durin, sir,’ said the waiter when they got up. Thorin bit his tongue. To his surprise he heard Bilbo snort.

‘Not bloody likely,’ he said, taking Thorin’s hand. ‘I prefer to feel welcome when my boyfriend takes me out on a date, no matter how good the food and the service are.’

Despite the situation, a surge of warmth coursed through Thorin hearing Bilbo refer to him as his boyfriend in public. Before he could say or do anything, Bilbo was pulling him towards the exit. They would have to pass by the complaining family. Thorin hesitated, but Bilbo walked on until they were right next to the table where the man was still regarding them with hostility. Thorin didn’t even have time to draw breath before Bilbo kissed him full on the mouth, firmly, thoroughly, taking his time. Thorin’s arms flailed around aimlessly, so surprised that he couldn’t think at all. Bilbo ended the kiss and through a light haze Thorin saw him give the scowling man a fat wink before dragging Thorin out of the room, accompanied by a deadly silence. They managed to grab their coats quickly, not even putting them on before going outside. Bilbo was still pulling Thorin with him and started to walk away from the restaurant, going faster and faster until they were jogging.

‘Wait, Bilbo, hold on,’ Thorin gasped. They stopped, stared at each other, mouths twisting until they burst out laughing. They laughed so hard that several passers-by stopped to look at them.

‘Oh god, Bilbo!’ exclaimed Thorin. ‘That was so...’

‘Brilliant, right?’ Bilbo gasped. ‘Did you see his face?’

‘No, I only saw you,’ Thorin said, grinning. ‘You *winked* at him!’ They doubled over again. Holding on to each other they tried to get their breath back.

‘Oh!’ Bilbo stopped snickering. ‘I forgot! You have to go back there. For your work. Oh blast, I’m sorry, Thorin.’ He looked miserable all of a sudden. Thorin could do nothing but take him in his arms and kiss his adorable face.

‘That doesn’t matter at all,’ he ensured him. ‘I don’t care one bit.’ And he didn’t. He had been shy all his life, always afraid to do things wrong, knowing that people thought him odd. But this hadn’t been odd, this had been a demonstration of something good, something right. And that man had been so wrong, so prejudiced.

‘Why, Bilbo?’ he asked, looking down on his boyfriend’s still rosy face. ‘Why does someone like that object to you and me holding hands? How does it hurt him?’ He caressed Bilbo’s cheek with his finger, full of wonder at the fact that he, Thorin Durin, was actually holding a man, no, not _a_ man, _this_ man, in the middle of the street and not even feeling self-conscious about it.

Bilbo reached up, giving him a quick kiss before distentangling himself from Thorin’s arms. 

‘Forget him,’ he said. ‘Let’s just get a coffee to complete this perfect evening.’

‘Hardly perfect,’ grumbled Thorin, falling in step with Bilbo. ‘I wanted it to be, but...’

‘I consider it perfect now,’ Bilbo said, nudging him in the side with his elbow. ‘Because as uncomfortable it was for a while, I loved kissing you in front of him. And laughing with you just now was the best thing ever. You know, I think it’s the first time I have heard you laugh out loud.’

‘Yes, well.’ Thorin thought about it. He didn’t really laugh all that much. In fact, he couldn’t remember the last time he had laughed like he just did with Bilbo. His heart warmed thinking about Bilbo, and Mrs Baggins, who had been so matter of factly when she had found them holding each other that first time in the kitchen. When Bilbo had pointed out to her that he had just been kissing Thorin, she had simply said: ‘Of course dear, and so you should,’ and enquired after tea.

Thorin chuckled. Bilbo looked aside, grinning.

‘What?’ he asked.

‘I was thinking about your mum,’ Thorin said, smiling. ‘The way she reacted when you kissed me in the kitchen. She’s lovely.’

Bilbo stopped dead in his tracks, turning to face Thorin. He couldn’t read the expression on his face. Bilbo didn’t say anything for a while, just looked at him.

‘You know,’ he said, sounding a bit choked. ‘I dated someone last year...’ Thorin’s stomach clenched, and he felt the colour drain from his face. The thought of Bilbo dating someone else cut through him like a knife. Somehow he had never considered it before, and despite thinking he was a fool overreacting like this, he couldn’t help feeling a bit nauseous. He turned away, trying to hide his face.

‘Oh, fig,’ he heard Bilbo say, and then his arms were around him. ‘Darling ... I just meant to say that I am so happy that you and my mother get along so well. The way you treat her. I could never be with someone who can’t ... can’t handle her being... you know.’ Thorin nodded, unable to speak. ‘He, that person, was so totally stupid around her when he met her. I wanted to throw him out after five minutes. We had only gone out for drinks a few times. Of course I never saw him again after that.’

Thorin could breathe a little easier at that, still feeling like an idiot.

‘Oh drat, you must think me such a mummy’s boy,’ sighed Bilbo. Somehow, that broke through Thorin’s mood, his chest opened up again and he smiled.

‘You are a bit,’ he whispered. ‘It’s very sweet.’ 

‘Oh hush!’ said Bilbo, slapping him on his arm while he let Thorin go. ‘You’re supposed to tell me that I’m not.’ The crinkles around his eyes reassured Thorin that he was joking.

‘I’m not in the habit of lying,’ said Thorin regally, squinting down at him, but not even trying to hide his grin. Bilbo chuckled beside him and slid his arm through Thorin’s.

‘Come let’s find that coffee shop, my dear,’ he said.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

Thorin sat daydreaming in his office again. After that eventful Friday evening and a long phone call on Saturday evening, Thorin and Bilbo had taken Mrs Baggins to the Zoo on Sunday and it had been an excellent outing. Bilbo had explained that they went regularly, which became obvious when the people in the restaurant and the little shop greeted them as old acqaintances. They seemed to eye Thorin with some curiosity. Bilbo didn’t say anything about him to them, but he wasn’t exactly shy about touching him or sliding his arm through Thorin’s. Thorin found that it didn’t bother him in the least. When some other visitors cast them glances, and even an occasional unkind mutter reached his ears, he just ignored it. He had never liked people touching him, but with Bilbo it just felt right. More than right actually. And he didn’t mind Mrs Baggins’ touches now either. She loved walking in between ‘her boys’ as she had started to call them, an arm hooked through each of theirs. Bilbo was radiant all day, and he seemed much less weary than he had been when Thorin first met him. Thorin hadn’t had such a wonderful day in decades.

He shook his head, forcing himself to concentrate on his work again. Checking his e-mail he found a message from Mr Throrson. Erebor had secured a large contract with a well-known manufacturing company, and to celebrate this there was an informal get-together on Friday after hours. Spouses or partners were always welcome to these things, Mr Throrson felt it forged unity in the office. Thorin’s skin prickled at the thought that he would bring Bilbo. But surely that was much too soon. They had only known each other for four weeks, been dating only ten days, he had no business asking Bilbo to meet his coworkers. They hadn’t even – his mind stuttered at the thought – they hadn’t even done more than kissing so far. Still, the thought of Bilbo accompanying him made him feel giddy. Not only did it seem easier than telling his colleagues he was seeing someone, but he found he wanted to show Bilbo off. He leaned his forehead on his hands, making a face at himself. 

Thorin kept thinking about it all week, but he didn’t ask Bilbo. On Tuesday he went early again, bringing Mrs Baggins fresh flowers. The nurse had been on time, so he found her already seated at the breakfast table. When he noticed that Bilbo had set three plates, he jerked his head up to find Bilbo blushing and smiling. ‘A man can hope,’ he had murmured. Thorin had been walking on clouds most of the day. On Wednesday and Thursday they texted, and talked on the phone for two hours in the evening, Mrs Baggins interjecting occasionally with snide remarks that made Bilbo laugh and Thorin chuckle. ‘Oblomov’ lay forgotten on the table next to Thorin’s chair.

On Friday afternoon Bilbo was home again and after only an hour of quick housework, they talked about Mr Grey’s offer at the small kitchen table. Thorin had studied the books and managed to find more general information as well. Bookshops were indeed a risky business, especially old-fashioned shops like Stormcrow, as Mr Grey’s books showed too. If Bilbo was serious about it, he would need to modernize in several ways. And it would still be risky, though not impossible. Bilbo had gone quiet for a while, leafing aimlessly through the information Thorin had printed out.

‘I still want this, Thorin,’ he said finally, looking up at him. ‘Is that very silly?’

Thorin took his hand.

‘It’s your dream, Bilbo. A dream is never silly. We’ll just have to find the best way to realize it.’

Bilbo looked down at their hands. He entwined his fingers with Thorin’s. It looked like he wanted to say something, but he didn’t.

‘Will you stay for dinner?’ he asked after a long pause.

‘I can’t,’ Thorin said full of regret. ‘There is a small celebration at the office and I have to be there, especially since I’m absent two half days every week now.’

‘Oh.’ Bilbo sounded rather disappointed. He rubbed his tumb over Thorin’s hand. Thorin inhaled, opened his mouth, closed it again. No, he shouldn’t. When he looked at Bilbo, he found his dark blue eyes on his face.

‘What were you going to say?’

‘Nothing,’ said Thorin, casting his eyes back down.

‘Thorin.’ 

It was enough to make Thorin look at him again. Was he ever going to be able to say no to this man?

‘It’s not...’ He trailed off.

‘What is it, darling? You know you can say anything to me, don’t you?’ When Thorin said nothing, he went on: ‘I won’t laugh at you or think you’re strange, Thorin. Please.’

‘We can bring people to office parties,’ Thorin said haltingly. ‘You know, spouses or ... or boyfriends.’ He coughed to mask his embarrassment. ‘Look, forget it, I know it’s much too soon.’

Bilbo did not let go of his hand, he did not scoff or laugh. 

‘Thorin,’ he said. Thorin looked up. Bilbo looked very serious and Thorin’s heart sank. Bilbo’s hand came up to caress his cheek.

‘You are right that it is soon, but...’ Bilbo’s face seemed to become slightly pink. ‘I feel like I have known you for much longer than it really is.’

‘Four and a half weeks,’ nodded Thorin. 

‘Thing is,’ Bilbo said, then went silent again. Somehow both his hands were now entangled with both of Thorin’s. Bilbo inhaled deeply. ‘Oh bother,’ he said. ‘Thorin, maybe we are going too fast, I don’t know, but I do know that this, us, feels so right, and I...I hope you think so too.’ Thorin nodded, eyes fixed on Bilbo’s face. ‘I guess, what I’m saying is that I am very honoured that you want to take me and I would actually love to go, but I would have to organize something for mum. I hope mrs Gamgee wouldn’t mind to have her over for a few hours.’

‘You would?’ asked Thorin. ‘I mean, want to come?’

Bilbo nodded, cheeks definitely red now. 

‘We could always take your mum with us.’

At that Bilbo’s eyes widened comically and he burst out laughing. Thorin smiled, he knew it was nonsense, but honestly, he wouldn’t even mind that much.

‘You promised not to laugh,’ he said with a mock pout. This made Bilbo laugh even harder. ‘I bet she would be a great success too,’ said Thorin. ‘She would certainly know how to handle Mr Throrson. Oh, and Dain, I would love to see her tackle Dain.’

Bilbo was still laughing as he slid on Thorin’s lap, straddling him. He tangled his hands in Thorin’s hair and pulled his head back before plunging into a searing kiss. Thorin embraced him, moaning into Bilbo’s mouth, while Bilbo started to slowly rock his hips against Thorin. Thorin hummed, letting a delicious feeling spread out from his groin, until he realised where they were. Or rather, who else was nearby.

‘God, Bilbo, stop... please...’ Thorin’s trousers had become decidedly tight. Bilbo stopped moving but he kept on kissing for a while. 

‘Sorry,’ he whispered, but he didn’t look sorry at all. There was a suspicious glint in his eyes. 

‘Bilbo, your mum is right there in the living room...’

‘Hmm,’ Bilbo said, pressing little kisses to Thorin’s jaw. ‘I love your beard, you know that?’

‘I had an inkling,’ said Thorin, daring to let his hands stray down to Bilbo’s hips, and lower.

‘Now who has to stop?’ said Bilbo, laughing, dragging Thorin’s hands up from his bottom to his back. They rested their foreheads together. Thorin realised he had no idea how they would ever be able to spend the night together. Bilbo couldn’t leave his mother alone, and Thorin was sure he would never be able to do anything knowing that Mrs Baggins was in the next room.

‘There is a guest room in the attic, at the back of the house, over my bedroom. My mother’s bedroom is at the front of the house,’ whispered Bilbo in his ear, as if he had read his mind. ‘Will you come to dinner tomorrow and stay the night?’

Thorin swallowed, burying his face in Bilbo’s neck. He wanted, yes, but it made him nervous too. He would have to say something before he lost his courage.

‘It’s been a very, very long time,’ he mumbled. And it wasn’t as if he had a lot of experience at any rate . But there was no way he could say that out loud. It would be alright. Of course it would.

Bilbo softly tugged on his hair, encouraging him to look up. When he met Bilbo’s eyes they were very soft, and he realised that Bilbo had guessed what he hadn’t said. He wanted to look away, feeling embarrassed, but suddenly Bilbo pulled his head against his shoulder, holding him very tight.

‘Oh, Thorin,’ he said in a strained voice. ‘You are such a treasure, I can’t believe you’re here with silly old me. Please trust me, I only want what you are ready to give me. And you are giving so much already, you have no idea.’

‘I could stay tonight,’ said Thorin, torn between want and nerves. 

‘I have to work tomorrow and when you stay, I want a lazy morning,’ Bilbo whispered, his fingers trailing through Thorin’s hair. ‘Mum likes to sleep in on Sundays, so ...’

Thorin blushed. The idea of sleeping with Bilbo while Mrs Baggins was in the house still unsettled him. He realised, however, that this was how it was with Bilbo, and that it wouldn’t change any time soon. Would Thorin even want it to? He really liked Mrs Baggins and he adored Bilbo for taking care of her as he did. How many people would simply have put her in a home? They came as a package, Bilbo and his mother. He would handle it somehow.

‘I’d love to stay tomorrow,’ he said. Bilbo placed soft kisses on Thorin’s head, trailing down to his temple and jaw.

‘I will make it very good for you, my darling,’ he whispered before kissing him on the mouth, sliding his tongue between his lips, and Thorin forgot everything else for a long while.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

Thorin walked around the car to open the door for Bilbo and help him out. Bilbo took his hand with a smile.

‘You’re such a romantic,’ he said as Thorin closed the door and locked the car. Thorin thought he was probably right, and it didn’t even make him blush. They were a little late, on account of Thorin having to go home and change into a suit. Bilbo, though told not to dress up too much since everybody would just be in their office suits, looked immaculate. 

He had asked what Thorin was going to wear (a charcoal suit with a light blue shirt and a dark blue tie with white dots) and had chosen a rather tight-fitting blue suit that brought out his eyes, with a white shirt and a light grey waistcoat, topped off with a fuchsia bow tie and matching pocket square. ‘I’m gay, I have a fashion degree and I work at Took-Brandybuck,’ he had said. ‘What do you expect? Besides, I always wear waistcoats and bow ties.’ Which was true. Bilbo always looked smart, even at home, where he discarded his jacket and bow tie but kept his waistcoat, although he would sometimes wear it open. Thorin thought he looked positively edible like that.

There was no one in the hall, the gathering being in the large conference room as usual. Thorin helped Bilbo out of his coat, then tucked Bilbo’s arm under his own and walked towards the party. They could hear the music and the murmur of voices coming from the doors, which were ajar. 

Thorin opened the door, leading Bilbo through without letting go of his arm. He tried to ignore the nervous fluttering in his stomach, looking around to find his boss. It took about ten seconds for silence to spread around the room, until just the soulless beat of the generic pop music could be heard. Thorin began to tremble, he had not anticipated this big a reaction. Then he felt Bilbo’s arm press his. He took a deep breath and, with his eyes focussed on Mr Throrson, began to cross the room. Quiet whispers began to rise and someone said, just loud enough to be heard: ‘I’ll be damned.’

Thorin reached Mr Throrson and his wife without stumbling, fainting or running away – which he considered quite a feat, although his face felt hot enough to heat the room.

‘Durin,’ said Mr Throrson, face schooled in a neutral expression.

‘Mr Throrson, may I introduce Mr Bilbo Baggins, my...’ Thorin cleared his throat. ‘My boyfriend.’ He was amazed that this came out as actual words instead of an incomprehensible jumble. His mind began to turn, thinking what a ridiculous word ‘boyfriend’ was when you were in your early forties, and no longer a boy by a long stretch, but before he could drift off too far, Bilbo’s voice brought him back.

‘Pleased to meet you, Mr Throrson, Mrs Throrson.’ They shook his hand.

‘Likewise. Mr Baggins, was it?’ If he was shocked or dismayed, Mr Throrson did not let it show.

‘Yes, sir,’ said Bilbo, not fazed in the least. ‘Bilbo Baggins. You have a very stylish office building, it must be rather old.’

‘Yes, yes it is, actually. About two hundred years old. Umm, can we offer you a drink?’ Mr Throrson pointed at the table a little away, which held a number of bottles and glasses. ‘It’s an informal party.’

‘I will get it,’ said Thorin. 

‘Oh, thank you, dear. Would you get me a glass of white wine?’ Bilbo said to Thorin, his eyes glittering. For a moment Thorin wasn’t sure if he was going to regret taking Bilbo with him. But when he turned back with a glass of white wine and a glass of orange juice and saw Bilbo standing there, looking ever so dapper, and conversing with Mr and Mrs Throrson with ease, he knew he had no regrets at all. In fact, when he reached them and handed Bilbo his wine, he slid his arm around Bilbo and it felt completely natural.

After a short conversation, the Throrsons were claimed by a board member who had just arrived and excused themselves. Thorin took a deep breath.

‘All well?’ asked Bilbo softly, his eyes serious now. Thorin nodded, taking a sip of his juice. The noise in the room had gone back to its original level, but the number of glances in their direction indicated that they were probably the number one topic of conversation right now.

‘Hold on, here come the secretaries,’ murmured Thorin when he saw three women accompanied by two men coming towards them.

‘Mr Durin,’ said Ms Dis, the oldest one, who had been with the firm for at least fifteen years. ‘What a nice surprise to see you with a guest.’ The looks Bilbo received from the three women were openly curious. Bilbo smiled and Thorin just knew he wanted to giggle.

‘Yes, this is my boyfriend, Mr Bilbo Baggins,’ Thorin said, already much more smoothly than the first time. And he went on to introduce the ladies. It didn’t take Bilbo long to charm them, including the husband and boyfriend of the younger secretaries. None of them seemed to have any misgivings about seeing Thorin with a man. They didn’t bat an eyelid when Bilbo curled his arm around Thorin’s waist and looked up at him adoringly. When Thorin left them for a moment to refill their glasses, Ms Dis walked with him.

‘What a charming man,’ she said. ‘You have got yourself a fine boyfriend, Mr Durin.’

Thorin blushed, but his happiness was so great that it didn’t even take him much effort to say: 

‘Thank you, Ms Dis, I think so too.’ 

She left him with a smile, and Thorin felt like he had only really met her for the first time today.

Thorin was pouring wine into Bilbo’s glass when a voice suddenly said:

‘That’s quite a surprise you’ve sprung on us, Durin.’

‘Hello, Dain,’ said Thorin without looking up.

‘You sure know how to keep a secret.’

‘Bilbo’s no secret,’ said Thorin, straightening and turning to Dain. To his surprise the man looked shaken rather than amused.

‘Jesus, Durin, why didn’t you say anything that afternoon? You could have told me he was your boyfriend.’

‘Would that have stopped you from thinking the words you used?’ Thorin said, irritated, leaving out the fact that he hadn’t actually been dating Bilbo at the time. ‘Or would you simply not have *said* them?’ He remembered the face of the man in the restaurant, so full of disdain and disgust, and his irritation turned to anger. 

‘God, Dain, why do people like you condemn so easily? Why mock people simply because they are different from the majority? You know nothing of Bilbo, and as it turns out, you don’t know a lot about me either.’

Dain was shrinking back as Thorin had raised his voice a little and people were starting to notice. Thorin felt like he wasn’t himself, words coming out that he had never dared to speak mere weeks ago. He tried to lower his voice again, not wanting to make a scene.

‘I am gay, yes, and so is Bilbo. That doesn’t mean it’s alright to call us fairies or sissies and laugh about it.’

‘You’re not a fairy,’ protested Dain weakly. ‘I would never have guessed...’

‘Oh, and that makes it alright to laugh at Bilbo for moving or talking a bit differently?’ Thorin clenched his fists and forced himself to breathe through his nose. He didn’t want to say things he might regret later. He would still have to work with Dain. Suddenly he felt a soft hand on the small of his back.

‘Weren’t you bringing me wine, dear?’ asked Bilbo. The words were relaxed, but there was a steeliness under them. Bilbo was looking at Dain and his eyes were hard. Thorin relaxed a little.

‘This is my colleague Dain, Bilbo,’ he said, carefully putting his arm around Bilbo’s expensively clad shoulders and pulling him close. ‘Dain, meet my boyfriend, Bilbo.’ Even through his anger, he felt proud and happy saying it, his heart swelling.

Bilbo thrust out his hand in such a way that it made Dain flinch, and again when Bilbo shook his hand apparently with some force. Thorin bit back a laugh at Dain’s face. He had never told Bilbo what Dain had said, but it was obvious that Bilbo had overheard at least some of their conversation just now.

‘Hello, Dain,’ said Bilbo, voice clipped. ‘We met before, when I came to see Thorin a few weeks ago.’ He looked Dain over from head to toe with narrowed eyes. This was a side to Bilbo that Thorin had not seen before. His pleasant, sweet boyfriend turned out to be perfectly able to stare someone down. Why did he find it ... sexy? 

‘Yes, ah, I remember,’ said Dain. He seemed flustered, which amused Thorin greatly.

When Bilbo didn’s say anything, just kept staring a little ominously, Dain cleared his throat.

‘Well, it’s nice to meet you.’ He glanced at Thorin. ‘It is a bit of a surprise, though.’ A trace of his usual bluster seemed to return.

‘I’m sure it is,’ said Bilbo. ‘Sometimes people do that, surprise others. Pleasantly or unpleasantly.’ The way he and Dain were gauging each other made Thorin feel like being caught up in a stand-off between two rivalling mafia bosses. 

‘Yes. Well.’ Dain seemed unable to find his equilibrium. ‘Oh, I see someone I have to talk to. Enjoy the rest of the party.’ He left hastily. Thorin chortled, then turned to see Bilbo scowling after Dain.

‘Don’t let Dain upset you, sweetheart,’ he said softly. ‘He’s just a prat.’

Bilbo looked at him with his intense eyes.

‘Oh, I’m not upset about what he apparently said about me, I don’t care a jot anymore what anyone says about me. But I won’t stand for people like that upsetting you.’

‘Oh.’ 

‘Don’t look so surprised, darling,’ Bilbo grinned. ‘You’re not the only one who can feel protective, you know.’

‘Oh,’ said Thorin again, rather dumbly. As he looked at Bilbo, a warm feeling began to unfurl in his belly, spreading out until it seemed to radiate from him, leaving him speechless. He saw Bilbo widen his eyes and then reach out for him. Hands closed around the back of his neck, tilting his head forward until their foreheads touched. Silently they breathed together. And at that moment Thorin knew that he was very much in love with Bilbo Baggins.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> \- I hope you liked this chapter! 
> 
> \- I considered making this a series, but since this chapter doesn’t completely stand on its own, I decided that chapters were a better choice. It’s also handy if you like to download things to read on e-reader or tablet (which I tend to do). Each chapter is a more or less rounded whole.
> 
> \- A shorter intermezzo chapter from Bilbo’s point of view is rearing itself in my head. And there will almost certainly be at least one more long chapter after that, but I can’t promise when. 
> 
> \- I am not going to go into Dain’s backstory because it doesn’t fit in my idea of this fic, but I have a feeling that either he is gay himself and fighting it or covering it by playing up, or that he is being dominated or even abused at home. In any case, he is trying to bluff himself into control because he feels he doesn’t have it. He’s a bit sad, really.
> 
> \- Yes, Erebor Accountants is a stuffy, old-fashioned type of firm, with people calling each other Mr and Mrs, or by their last name. Just because I love imagining such a firm. Sometimes I think I was born a couple of centuries too late.


	3. Intermezzo:  Darling dwarf

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bilbo muses about Thorin and his book and discovers it is a bit of a special day.

Bilbo tapped his fingers on the edge of the table, rereading the battle scene he had just written. He contemplated how the dwarf knight who led the quest against the dragon had completely morphed into Thorin in his mind. A Thorin with long hair, heavy armour and a sword. He sighed. Thorin would look marvellous like that. Not that he didn’t look marvellous anyway, the man was simply gorgeous, and he was so unaware of it. Bilbo smiled at the thought of his lover who could be so oblivious about some things, yet so perceptive about others. It seemed that he saw very clearly whatever it was that got his attention, but all the rest faded into the background somehow.

Bilbo was still undecided if he would introduce a love interest into the story, and if he did, what kind. Part of him wanted the knight to save not a beautiful damsel but a handsome lad in distress. After all, if the dwarf knight was Thorin, Bilbo should be in there as well, shouldn’t he? He chuckled at the thought. But apart from inserting himself in the story, which was rather a bad idea, it would be interesting to make the love story a gay one. He wondered how it would be received by the age group he intended it for, young teens. It wouldn’t be very smart to diminish his chances of selling his very first book.

He glanced at the clock. An hour left before Thorin would be here, he should start cooking soon. At least the new domestic help, who had replaced Thorin when his community service hours were fulfilled, worked well and her shift had finished already. He looked over at his mum. She was sleeping in her chair. He stared at her, emotions warring in his heart. Love, sadness, thankfulness, worry. How long would he be able to keep her here, at home? How slow or fast would she deteriorate? He shook his head. Don’t think about that, think about the story. 

The dwarf knight was severely wounded in the battle, but luckily his warriors had been able to defeat the goblins and were now faced with the task of making sure their leader would not die from his wounds.

Bilbo sighed. He feared he was suffering from writer’s block. Ever since Thorin had entered his life, and especially since his wild idea about buying Stormcrow Books had led to Bilbo now working there on Wednesday afternoons, his book had taken a back seat. At least he had managed to finish the battle scene today. He saved the file again and closed his laptop. Mum would have to wait a little longer to be read to from the notebook where he penned each chapter after he finished it on his laptop. Somehow he liked seeing it in handwriting. He wished he could draw too, so he could enlighten it with pictures.

Suddenly he heard a key turn in the lock of the front door, followed by heavy steps in the hallway. He leapt up from his chair.

‘Thorin!’ he cried as he jumped his boyfriend, who was in the process of hanging up his coat. Thorin laughed as he caught him, hauling him up in his strong arms. They kissed and nuzzled.

‘You’re early!’ Bilbo said while Thorin put him down. There was a big grocery bag on the floor. ‘And you brought food!’

‘I took two hours off,’ Thorin said. ‘And I brought groceries for dinner,’

‘But I always cook on Fridays,’ Bilbo said. 

‘I thought we could make vegetable lasagna together,’ said Thorin. For some reason he looked shy. Such an adorable man, still shy at times and still blushing all the time, even though they had been together for almost three months now. No, wait, exactly twelve weeks today. 

Thorin had grabbed the bag and was making his way to the kitchen. He stopped at Bilbo’s mother’s chair, as he always did, smiled and pressed a light kiss on her forehead, careful not to wake her. Bilbo’s heart swelled. How was it possible that Thorin was so fond of his mum? He accepted her and her Alzheimer’s so easily. And even more astonishing: he was now taking care of her every Saturday, coming over on Friday after work and staying until Sunday after lunch. He had lightened Bilbo’s burden so much.

Bilbo quickly wiped a hand over his eyes as he followed Thorin.

‘Hold on, my darling dwarf,’ he said. Thorin turned around, eyebrows raised.

‘Dwarf?’ He looked disbelieving, towering over Bilbo. Bilbo giggled, a rare blush colouring his cheeks.

‘I think you’re featuring in my book,’ he said. ‘But what I wanted to say is this.’ He grabbed Torin’s face and kissed him. ‘I figured out what day it is,’ he said. ‘I can’t believe I didn’t think of it before.’

‘It’s not that important,’ Thorin said, fidgeting. 

‘Oh, but it is,’ said Bilbo. ‘Happy twelve week anniversary, darling.’

Thorin chuckled.

‘I feel like a sixteen year old girl,’ he said, blushing.

‘And how would you know how a sixteen year old girl feels?’ asked Bilbo teasingly. ‘So, vegetable lasagna, eh? That wasn’t that particular Friday, though.’

‘I know, but ... it was a special evening too.’

‘You know what?’ Bilbo said ‘I think I have enough apples to bake us a small apple pie, with half the sugar of course.’

Thorin smiled at him, the smile that made Bilbo weak in the knees. He still had no idea how nobody had snatched Thorin long before Bilbo met him. He was so handsome, so caring, and so sensitive underneath his stern, serious exterior. 

‘Thorin?’ he said, voice constricted. Neither of them had given words to what they had both felt at that Erebor party so many weeks ago. Bilbo had been scared to say it, scared that it was too soon, that he might be mistaken. But he wasn’t mistaken. This was different from anything he had ever felt before, this sense of rightness, of belonging.

‘Yes?’ said Thorin, looking at him intently with those ice blue eyes that radiated warmth just for him.

‘I love you.’

‘And I love you,’ said Thorin simply, as if it was the most natural thing in the world. Maybe, Bilbo thought as he melted into Thorin’s arms, maybe it was.


	4. Destinations

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Life goes on for Bilbo, Thorin and mum as opportunities present themselves and their paths merge even more.

The dulcet tones of the [Flower Duet](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8Qx2lMaMsl8) suddenly sounded in Thorin’s office. He was working late to finish an urgent job that had come up at the last moment. 

‘Hello, sweetheart,’ he said, not needing to look at the screen of his mobile. The Flower Duet caller ID would always show his current favourite picture of Bilbo. 

‘Are you home yet?’ said his boyfriend. He sounded slightly tense.

‘No, I’m still at the office. Why, is something the matter?’ Thorin’s attention was now fully focussed. Although mum’s health was generally good, apart from the ever present Alzheimer’s, she was still an elderly lady.

‘No... well, yes, but it’s nothing to worry about. When will you be finished? Do you think you could come over?’

‘Of course I can come over.’ Thorin looked at his pile of work. ‘I’m afraid I will be a few hours yet, I really have to finish this by tomorrow morning. If you need me now, I can be there in half an hour. I can always go back to the office later.’

‘That’s not necessary, love. Really, don’t worry, it’s nothing bad, I just want to talk about it with you.’

Somehow that didn’t completely take away Thorin’s worry. He was quiet for a few moments, and as usual Bilbo guessed what was going on in his mind.

‘Alright, I’ll tell you the short version, otherwise you will start to worry whatever I say,’ said Bilbo. Thorin could hear the smile in his voice. ‘I will be able to take over Stormcrow a lot sooner than we thought.’

Thorin sat up.

‘Really?’ This was unexpected. And it would need decidedly more than just a talk. There would be quite a lot to find out and organize, and...

‘And stop thinking about it now!’ said Bilbo with a laugh. He really knew him too well. ‘You need to focus on your work. Finish it as soon as you can and come over. There are Stilton and walnut crackers, I’ve been industrious this afternoon. Mum helped.’

Thorin grinned. Since he didn’t like sweet pastry too much, Bilbo had collected quite an arsenal of recipes for salty crackers and pastries over the months. The man loved to bake.

‘You two spoil me,’ he said fondly. 

‘Always,’ said Bilbo. ‘See you later then. Love you.’

‘Love you too.’

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

Bilbo refused to tell him anything before he believed that Thorin had eaten dinner, which had been pizza ordered by his colleague, Balin Fundin, who had also been working late. Then he insisted on installing Thorin on the couch with a plate of Stilton and walnut crackers and a glass of apple juice mixed with mineral water.

‘Will you tell me already!’ said Thorin, finally fed up when Bilbo continued to fuss about, pouring his mother a cup of tea and getting himself a glass of grape juice.

‘Yes, yes,’ said Bilbo, scurrying back to the living room and falling down on the couch, next to Thorin. He clenched his fingers together in an apparent effort to hide his excitement.

‘Okay, this is the story,’ Bilbo said, taking a deep breath. ‘Mr Grey turns out to have an older brother who lives in the North. He received word that his brother is unwell and he has decided that he wants to move there to take care of him. So now he has decided he wants to sell Stormcrow Books, and has offered it to me.’

Thorin frowned.

‘What, *now*?’

Bilbo nodded, his eyes gleaming.

‘As soon as can be arranged.’

Thorin exhaled and sagged into the back of the couch, head leaning backwards. He stared at the ceiling, his mind already starting to turn at full speed. He hadn’t yet done any serious research into funding and organizing since it was assumed Mr Grey would not be selling for at least another one or two years. He wondered if he should ...

‘Say something?’ said Bilbo, voice small and a little shaky. Thorin lifted his head to watch his boyfriend. Bilbo was regarding him with some trepidation. 

‘I will start collecting data tomorrow. If the work I did this evening does not need any adding, I am certain Mr Throrson will allow me the day off. Until now I have only occasionally thought of ways to fund this, but I have some ideas I can follow up. Balin knows someone who helps people who want to set up business and...’

A soft hand was put over his mouth. Bilbo looked at him with a barely concealed smile.

‘Does this mean you agree with me buying Stormcrow?’

‘Umm, yes, do you have to ask?’ He stared at Bilbo. ‘Of course you are buying Stormcrow, that was always the plan, wasn’t it?’

‘I guess, but...’

Thorin waited, but no words were coming out of Bilbo’s mouth.

‘But what?’

‘Well, that was before we, you know, got together.’

‘What difference does that make?’ asked Thorin, frowning.

‘Well, we haven’t really talked about it since, and ... and ... it concerns you too now.’ Bilbo put his hand on Thorin’s, stroking it absentmindedly. ‘It influences our... the future.’

‘Yes, it does,’ said Thorin. He gathered Bilbo in his arms and pressed a kiss on his head. ‘It means you are going to realize your dream and I get to help you do that.’ Which was part of his own dream.

‘Are you going to have your bookshop?’ asked Mrs Baggins suddenly. ‘And will you sell your book there? You need to do that, you know.’

Bilbo scrambled off Thorin’s lap and went to his mother. He hugged her, then crouched in front of her.

‘Yes, I am going to have my bookshop, at least if we can manage to finance it. And one day I will sell my book there.’

‘Good,’ said Mrs Baggins. ‘There have to be pictures in it. I want to see the dragon, and the dwarves, especially the knight.’

‘He looks like Thorin,’ said Bilbo in a stage whisper, glancing at Thorin who grimaced at him. Bilbo’s main hero was a source of playful banter between them, with Bilbo insisting that he looked exactly like his lover, only with long hair, and Thorin saying that it was a silly idea since he was 1.89 m tall and in no way a dwarf.

‘He does?’ cried Mrs Baggins, who was forgetting more and more these days. ‘Oh, that is a great idea. He is so handsome!’

Thorin blushed while Bilbo grinned. Mrs Baggins kept mentioning Thorin’s looks and he still didn’t always know how to handle it. He plucked at his beard. He had let it grow a little longer because Bilbo loved running his hands through it. Of course now he could also tangle his fingers in it and grab him quite tightly, which was lovely at some times, and a bit of a disadvantage at others.

Bilbo sat down next to him again, snuggling into his side.

‘Are you serious about taking tomorrow off to start looking into things?’

‘Of course,’ rumbled Thorin, slowly moving his hand over Bilbo’s back. They had been together over the weekend, as always, but he didn’t think he could ever get enough of touching Bilbo and feeling his plump body against him. Bilbo had once suggested that maybe he should lose some weight. Thorin had frozen and blurted out: ‘God, no!’ in such a horrified tone of voice that Bilbo, after staring at him with wide eyes for a moment, had laughed wholeheartedly, kissed him thoroughly, and never mentioned it again.

‘Maybe I could get the day off too,’ Bilbo mused.

‘No need,’ said Thorin. ‘I better do this alone. Later there will be days we need to be together. Better save up your days.’

‘But you’re doing all the hard work.’

Thorin scoffed. 

‘There will be plenty of hard work for you to do later,’ he said. ‘You are the one who is going to run the shop.’

‘Would you boys like some tea?’ Mrs Baggins asked, getting up.

‘Lovely, mum,’ answered Bilbo.

‘Thanks, mum, said Thorin at the same time, humouring her like they often did. 

They grinned at each other, but Thorin saw the tiny speck of worry in Bilbo’s eyes. His mother was deteriorating slowly. She was becoming more forgetful, and her irregular moments of confusion were a little more often these days. In a reflex, Thorin pulled Bilbo close, holding him tight. Bilbo sighed against him, not saying anything. They hardly ever mentioned it, but they both knew it was happening.

‘We can’t move there,’ Bilbo said softly when his mother was in the kitchen. 

‘What do you mean?’

‘I can’t move to live above the shop with mum.’

‘But why not?’ asked Thorin. It seemed such a wonderful solution, not having to rely on others so often.

‘Because it would confuse her very much to be moved to a different environment,’ answered Bilbo. ‘I discussed it with the geriatrician last time she went for a check up. And she said that moving mum out of her house of almost fifty years would very probably cause a serious turn for the worse. Keeping things as they are is the best way to keep her as well as possible.’ His hands went up blindly to grab Thorin’s beard as he pressed his face against his shoulder. 

‘Love your beard,’ he said, his voice a bit rough.

‘I know,’ whispered Thorin against his ear. ‘You can even pull at it if you want.’

Bilbo chuckled at that, tugged a little with his fingers, then looked up, eyes slightly moist.

‘Do you want _me_ to grow a beard?’ he asked, trying to smile, apparently desperately avoiding the other subject.

‘No,’ said Thorin, smiling back. ‘I like you soft and clean shaven.’ He touched his lips to Bilbo’s chin. He could tell he had shaved for him this afternoon, though it wasn’t really necessary with his slow beard growth. ‘You know I do.’

Bilbo nodded, starting to say something when Mrs Baggins came back into the living room, carrying a tray with three cups.

‘Can you bring the tea pot, Bungo?’ she asked, looking at Bilbo.

‘’Course, mum,’ said Bilbo. Thorin reluctantly let him go. 

‘I’m staying tonight,’ he said to Bilbo’s shapely behind, as he walked to the kitchen. ‘If you want me to.’

Bilbo looked over his shoulder, raising his eyebrows. He grinned when he saw where Thorin’s eyes were directed, then wiggled his bottom.

‘Are you sure?’ he asked mischievously.

‘Quite sure,’ answered Thorin, grinning back, and managing not to blush. 

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

‘I’ve been thinking,’ said Thorin on Wednesday afternoon. Mum was at daycare, as always on Wednesdays and Thursdays and Thorin was taking a long lunch break to visit Bilbo and Mr Grey at Stormcrow Books. He had been taking photographs of the shop to add to the file they were going to use to find financiers. At the moment they were upstairs in Mr Grey’s flat, which he had graciously allowed them to inspect.

‘If you can’t live here with mum, it would be a loss of money to keep it unoccupied.’

Bilbo nodded, looking around at the cozy flat. It had a nice lounge, a reasonable kitchen, a separate loo and a small bedroom on this floor. The second floor held two more bedrooms and a bathroom.

‘How about...’ Thorin hesitated. He had thought about this long and hard, but he wasn’t sure how Bilbo would react to his idea. ‘How about I rent it and move here?’

In the silence that followed, they heard the bell of the shop door downstairs as another customer entered or left.

‘Would you want that?’ asked Bilbo.

‘Yes, very much so. And... I mean, it would be ideal wouldn’t it?’ Thorin didn’t really want to think about a future where Bilbo would be free to move to the shop and maybe want to live there with him, because it would involve mum no longer living with Bilbo. But he couldn’t help picturing them living here together one day.

Bilbo was looking at him with an unreadable expression on his face.

‘I guess,’ he said slowly, casting his eyes down.

‘What is it? Don’t you like the idea?’ 

‘Yes, yes, I do, it’s a great solution,’ Bilbo said, still not looking up. Thorin had the distinct impression that something wasn’t right. He walked over to him, put a finger under his chin and made Bilbo look at him.

‘What then?’ he asked. 

‘I just... I hoped that maybe ... No, forget it, you wouldn’t, not with mum ....’ Bilbo took a deep breath. ‘This would be fine.’

Thorin kept his finger under Bilbo’s chin, looking into the dark blue eyes and losing himself there a bit. He blinked.

‘What did you hope, sweetheart?’ His heart was beating a little faster as he thought about what Bilbo could have meant.

‘Nothing,’ said Bilbo, too quickly. ‘Now, I think we can go back down, if you have enough information.’

‘Bilbo...’ But Bilbo had turned around and started to descend the stairs. Thorin looked after him, unsure how to handle this. Did Bilbo want him to come live at the terraced house with him and mum? Was that what he didn’t want to say? His heart skipped a beat at the thought. And with that came another thought that had crossed his mind increasingly often these days, as he saw mum deteriorating slowly. She recognized Bilbo most of the time, and usually knew who Thorin was too, though not always his name. How long would she still be cognitive enough to understand things? Sadness filled his heart, but also determination. He would need to think about his a little bit more, but he didn’t want to wait much longer. They had been together for a little over eight months now, and Thorin was completely sure about his feelings for Bilbo. There was no doubt in his mind that he wanted to spend the rest of his life with him. But how could he be sure if Bilbo felt the same? Was it still too soon? He carded a hand through his hair. He would have to take a chance, scary as it was.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

‘I finished the final chapter!’ exclaimed Bilbo as he closed his laptop. Thorin looked up from his calculations. Bilbo was grinning broadly, fists raised above his head in triumph. He jumped up and began a silly dance around the living room. Thorin couldn’t help but laugh. Mrs Baggins woke up from her dozing and clapped her hands happily. Then Bilbo hopped over to Thorin and bowed for him.

‘May I have this dance, oh beautiful man?’ he said, a little breathless.

Thorin hesitated, he really didn’t dance, the thought alone made him blush. But then Bilbo stretched out his hand, head cocked the way that Thorin was never able to withstand. He took Bilbo’s hand and let himself be led around the living room in Bilbo’s arms while Bilbo la-la-la’d [the Blue Danube](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5PiSh8fyMfE) . They waltzed over to where Mrs Baggins sat, hauled her up and took her with them. She laughed as they held her tight.

‘Allow me,’ said Thorin. He let go of Bilbo, took Mrs Baggins in his arms, lifted her and turned around so she flew up. He did it gently, but she squealed with delight. When he tried to put her down again she clenched her arms around his neck and said:

‘Your *such* a good boy for my Bilbo, Thorin.’ As she gave him a kiss on his cheek, he tried not to choke up.

‘Thanks, mum,’ he croaked softly. After he had put her on the floor, it was another pair of arms that clenched around his neck.

‘Love you so much,’ Bilbo whispered in his ear. Then he slapped Thorin’s bottom with a wink and said: ‘I’m going to bake biscuits now, we need to celebrate!’

‘You do realize you will have to read mum and me the whole story now,’ said Thorin as he followed Bilbo to the kitchen. ‘From the beginning.’

Bilbo thumped his head on the counter.

‘God,’ he sighed. Then he perked up. ‘Why don’t you read it to us in your delicious voice?’

Thorin snorted and blushed at the same time.

‘As if I’m going to read a handwritten book!’

‘What! It’s amazingly beautiful handwriting!’

Thorin harrumphed, since he couldn’t really deny it. 

‘And anyway, you can read it from a printout if you prefer. We can start tonight.’ Bilbo was puttering about in the kitchen, getting the ingredients ready.

Thorin looked at him.

‘I don’t know how to read a story,’ he said. ‘And I don’t have a delicious voice.’

‘You so do,’ said Bilbo, pouring flour in a pot. ‘It’s deep and lovely. I could listen to you recite the phone book.’

Thorin erupted in surprised laughter.

‘I could read you Mr Grey’s ledgers,’ he snickered. Bilbo flicked some flour at him.

‘Shoo,’ he said. ‘Go to the living room and put on some nice music, otherwise mum will want to watch the telly.’ As Thorin obeyed, Bilbo called after him: ‘And start to print out my book!’

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

Thorin was tense. His stomach felt like it was at sea and he hadn’t been able to eat all day. For the umpteenth time he felt in his pocket. The small box was still there. He closed his eyes. Why was he so nervous? Surely everything would be alright? Bilbo would say yes, wouldn’t he? You never know, his treacherous insecurity supplied. It might be a bridge too far. Bilbo had never actually mentioned living together, let alone... And then there was the other thing, that might be even more difficult. He carded his hand through his hair, taking a deep breath. He checked his watch. Bilbo would be home any moment now. [Chopin's Nocturnes](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IdimyyD-ZQk) were playing softly in the background. He surveyed the table. Everything was ready, it almost looked like a restaurant. Was it too much? What would Bilbo think? Would ... His train of thought was disrupted by the sound of Bilbo’s key in the front door. Thorin hastened to the hallway.

‘Hello sweetheart,’ he said, taking the coat from a surprised Bilbo’s hands. ‘Come in.’

Bilbo looked him up and down. Thorin blushed under his amused scrutiny. He was wearing one of his best suits and had even contemplated adding a waistcoat as Bilbo had been trying to get him to wear, but he thought it would make everything too solemn and he was nervous enough as it was.

‘Don’t you look dashing,’ Bilbo said, reaching up to kiss Thorin. He made it a long, lingering kiss. ‘Hmmm. What’s the occasion, love?’

‘Dinner,’ said Thorin. ‘Come in.’

As they entered the living room, Bilbo immediately noticed the absence of his mother. He turned to Thorin with raised eyebrows.

‘Mum’s with Drogo and Primula,’ Thorin said, leading Bilbo to his chair. ‘Would you like a glass of white wine?’ His voice wavered, threatened to give in. How was he to get through the rest of the evening? He cleared his throat and turned to get the bottle. His hand was unsteady as he poured Bilbo a glass. When he put it down, he saw Bilbo staring at him with a curious expression on his face. Thorin felt sick. 

‘Umm, there’s ah...’ He cleared his throat again. ‘Shrimp cocktail. As you see.’ He made a gesture towards the table. He had no idea how he was going to eat one spoonful himself

‘Yes, I see.’ Bilbo’s face had gone from curious and slightly amused to quiet, and he seemed a bit pale. When Thorin started towards his own chair, Bilbo suddenly grabbed his hand.

‘Thorin?’ he asked. Thorin swallowed.

‘Yes?’

They looked at each other until Thorin blinked. He didn’t know if he was blushing or deadly pale. He opened his mouth, but nothing came out. He saw Bilbo’s eyes go down to his jacket pocket and realised he was fingering the little box again. He froze, then he knew there was only one thing he could do. Surprising himself, he sank down on one knee, taking out the box at the same time.

‘I, ah, umm.’ He bowed his head. ‘God.’ He took a deep breath and looked up at Bilbo who was now sporting a fierce blush on his cheeks and staring at him with huge eyes.

‘Okay, I’m really, really bad at this. I had this whole speech but I can’t remember a word of it now.’ He fumbled with the box. ‘It’s just... I love you, Bilbo, and I want to be with you for the rest of my life. Will you marry me?’ He thrust the box towards Bilbo as if it burned in his hand, then felt like a complete idiot. Bilbo took the box without looking at it. His eyes never left Thorin’s face. 

‘Yes,’ Bilbo squeaked. He made a strange noise, almost a sob. ‘Yes, of course I will marry you, darling. Of course I will. Tomorrow if you want. Tonight even.’ He leaned forward and let himself fall into Thorin’s arms. Thorin managed to stay upright, pressing Bilbo close and feeling the tension drain from his body.

‘I love you so much,’ he whispered. ‘You, and your mum too. You know she’s included in this, don’t you? I mean, I didn’t want to wait any longer because I want her to ... to know this, to understand what’s happening. You know what I mean?’

Suddenly Bilbo was crying. Loud sobs wracked his body as he clutched to Thorin, the edge of the ring box painfully pressing against Thorin’s neck where Bilbo’s hand held on to him. He didn’t care. He just held Bilbo lovingly, rubbing his back, humming something he later recognized as an old lulleby.  
It seemed to take a long time before Bilbo calmed down. Thorin’s knee was beginning to hurt.

‘God, I’m sorry,’ said Bilbo, sniffing. ‘Not the sort of reaction you need after a marriage proposal.’ He moved to sit up straight, wiping his eyes.

‘You said yes,’ said Thorin, raising himself with some difficulty. ‘That’s all the reaction I need.’ He stood next to Bilbo, a little unsure what to do now. Bilbo hadn’t looked at the ring yet. 

‘Get your chair overhere,’ said Bilbo patting on the table. He was now holding the little black box in both hands. Thorin obeyed, putting the chair so close to Bilbo that their legs were touching. 

‘Let’s see what you got me,’ said Bilbo, voice a bit wobbly. He opened the box with trembling fingers. 

‘Oh,’ he said when he saw the platinum band with the elegant details. ‘Oh, that’s beautiful, Thorin.’ He looked up at him, eyes still red from crying, moist lashes curling up, a watery smile on his face.

‘You like it?’ asked Thorin. ‘Honestly?’

‘It’s perfect, darling, will you put it on my finger?’ He held up the box. Thorin took out the ring and carefully slid it on Bilbo’s left ring finger. He held onto the hand, leaned over and tenderly kissed Bilbo on the lips.

‘My beautiful fiancé,’ he whispered against his mouth. Bilbo giggled.

‘Fiancé,’ he sighed happily. ‘I like the sound of that.’

They kissed some more before finally starting on the meal that Thorin had cooked. Well, he had cooked part of it, bought part of it already prepared. He was relaxed enough now that he could actually eat. Bilbo gave his delighted attention to every dish, cheeks rosy from happiness and excitement. He alternated looking at his food, at Thorin and at his left hand with a grin.

As they were approaching dessert, Thorin tensed up again. He still needed to discuss the other thing with Bilbo, but he kept postponing it. Maybe he didn’t have to do that now, maybe it could just as well wait until they were discussing things about the wedding and the marriage. Marriage. He put down his fork. He was going to be married to Bilbo.

‘What?’ asked Bilbo, amused. ‘Why are you grinning so inanely now?’

‘I’m going to be your husband,’ said Thorin, filled with wonder.

‘I know!’ said Bilbo, smiling broadly. ‘And I’m going to be yours.’

He needed to do it now. Thorin wiped his mouth with his napkin.

‘Bilbo,’ he started.

Bilbo’s face fell a bit.

‘There is something I need to tell you.’

‘Oh?’ said Bilbo, looking worried. 

‘No, no, don’t worry,’ Thorin hastened to reassure him. ‘It’s nothing bad. It’s just...’ He fidgeted with his napkin. ‘You see, with us getting married and the plans with Stormcrow, I think you need to know that, umm, that I have quite a bit of money set aside.’ He looked at Bilbo to gauge his reaction. Bilbo just frowned, looking a bit surprised.

‘I know you earn a nice salary at Erebor,’ Bilbo said.

‘No, it’s not just that, although I don’t spend all that much. No, my father’s family was well-off, and he added to that with his investments. When my parents died, things were split between me and Frerin. I spread it over different investments, government bonds and savings accounts and, well, it’s done rather well over time.’ He took a pause to sip from his mineral water. ‘Frerin occasionally tried to get me to invest in one of his insane schemes over in the US, but I never gave in to that. Lucky me, I think he’s living off his wife’s money now.’ He hadn’t been in contact with Frerin for years, not that he regretted it much. His brother and he had never had much in common, and with Ferin living in America they had fallen out of touch pretty thoroughly.

Bilbo was looking down at his almost empty plate now. He was playing with his engagement ring with his right hand. He cleared his throat.

‘What are you saying? I’m not sure I understand...’

‘I don’t know really. I want nothing more than to give it all to you so it would be so much easier to buy Stormcrow, but I think you wouldn’t want that. And maybe you’re right about that.’ Now Thorin was looking down on his plate. ‘But when we’re married, half of it will be yours anyway, and I thought you need to know that, because it changes things. Or it could. Oh, I don’t know.’

Bilbo didn’t say anything for a long time, and Thorin felt like he was shrinking by the minute. He had done this all wrong. He should have told him earlier. But how do you do that? Do you just blurt it out on a Sunday afternoon? ‘Oh, hey, by the way, I have a pretty nice bank account.’ It had never meant much to him, though it had been a comfort to know that he wouldn’t have to worry about his pension. Investing in Stormcrow had crossed his mind when the whole bookshop dream had come up, but he had realised that being financially entangled with Bilbo’s business might not be a good idea. It could complicate things between them. He would never want Bilbo to feel like he was indebted to him.

‘You don’t want a prenup then?’ Bilbo’s voice sounded small.

‘What? No!’ He looked at Bilbo, whose eyes stared at Thorin like he wanted to penetrate his very soul. ‘Do... do you? If you do, of course I...’ He stopped when Bilbo pushed his chair backwards and stood up. He came over to Thorin, standing in front of him with his eyes still trained on him. Then he crouched down, looking up at Thorin as he took his hand, steadying himself on Thorin’s thigh with the other hand.

‘I don’t have too much myself,’ Bilbo said. ‘I earn well at the moment, but, well, I have been taking care of mum for a long time now. My dad didn’t leave much of a pension behind, and there have been extra costs since she’s been ill.’ He took a deep breath. ‘We need to think about this, and talk about it, Thorin.’

‘There are a lot of options,’ Thorin said. He had been mulling over it for weeks. ‘I have been thinking...’

‘Not now, love,’ said Bilbo. ‘Let’s not talk business tonight.’

‘Are you angry that I didn’t tell you sooner?’ asked Thorin hesitantly.

‘No, no, I’m not. Well, maybe a little bit, but it wasn’t really any of my business...’ Bilbo watched Thorin’s finger rub his engagement ring. ‘I can see how it must have been a bit awkward.’

‘I have never really cared about it much,’ said Thorin. Bilbo smiled.

‘I guessed that,’ he said, studying Thorin’s face. ‘That’s just like you. I don’t care about money a whole lot either, though I do have an expensive taste in suits.’ He winked as Thorin grinned, feeling relieved. Then he leaned up and kissed Thorin lightly on his mouth. ‘Let’s talk about it another time, we’ll figure it out. The biggest question now is: do you have any dessert?’

 

Primula opened the door.

‘Why, hello, you are earlier than I’d expected,’ she said with a wink. Thorin blushed, but Bilbo stuck out his left hand without words. It took Primula a few moments, but then she saw it. She raised her hands to her mouth.

‘Oh! Oh, Bilbo!’ She hugged him, then Thorin. ‘So *that* was the reason! You sneaky man, you never told us! Oh, congratulations!’

‘Thanks.’ Bilbo beamed as he took Thorin’s arm. ‘Come, I want to see mum’s face. How has she been, Primula?’

‘Oh, fine, fine. She’s really good tonight. Drogo is playing rummikub with her right now.’

Bilbo’s cousin was seated at the table with Mrs Baggins. They both looked up when the three of them entered. Bilbo pulled Thorin with him.

‘Mum!’ he said excitedly. ‘Look!’ He held out his left hand again. ‘Thorin has asked me to marry him!’

Mrs Baggins stared at his hand a bit nearsightedly. Then her face lit up.

‘Oh darling, that’s so wonderful! See, I always told you you would meet your prince one day!’ 

‘You did, and I didn’t believe you,’ said Bilbo, hugging her. Mrs Baggins extended an arm to Thorin in order to have him join the hug.

‘Come here, you gorgeous man. I said you were good for my Bilbo, didn’t I? And I was right. I’m always right.’

‘Yes, mum,’ said Thorin and Bilbo in unison, looked at each other and burst out laughing.

‘Now, you be good to Thorin too, Bilbo, or I’ll steal him away and marry him myself.’ Mrs Baggins winked at Thorin.

‘Oh, you’re not getting him, mum, not for anything.’ Bilbo let go of his mother and closed his arms around Thorin’s body with the death grip of a grizzly bear. ‘He’s mine, all mine.’

There was a fierce undertone in his voice that made Thorin shudder at his words. Bilbo looked up sharply. Thorin blushed, ducking his head and hiding his face in Bilbo’s hair. Bilbo would laugh at him, surely. Big man undone by one simple word. God, the feeling that Bilbo wanted him, really wanted him to be his. He shuddered again. Bilbo didn’t laugh. Instead his arms tightened around Thorin even more.

‘I love you so much.’ Bilbo’s voice broke. ‘So much. You have no idea.’

‘Aww, you guys.’ Primula sounded teared up. Drogo had his arm around her shoulder as they looked at the little scene with a smile.

‘Congratulations, both of you,’ said Drogo.

‘Thank you,’ said Bilbo. Thorin, who had emerged from Bilbo’s curls still flushed, could only nod.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

‘You liked it, didn’t you? 

Thorin turned on his side to look at Bilbo, who had just rolled away, tossed the tissues on the floor, and was now lying on his back.

‘I always do,’ said Thorin, sliding his hand over Bilbo’s chest down to his belly. Bilbo smiled, catching his hand to kiss his fingers.

‘No, I meant earlier. When I said you are mine.’

‘I did,’ confessed Thorin. He watched as Bilbo pressed his lips to Thorin’s palm.

‘You...’ Bilbo turned towards Thorin. ‘I felt your body shiver.’

Thorin shifted on his back, unable to look Bilbo in the eye.

‘I did,’ he said softly. ‘I never knew how good it would feel to... _belong_.’

Bilbo slid close to him, one arm possessively over Thorin’s waist. He pressed a kiss on his shoulder. As he laid his head on Thorin’s chest, he said:

‘Thank you for letting me in.’

They lay quietly for a while. Thorin thought back to when he had first seen Bilbo.

‘I think you waltzed your way in right from the start,’ he said quietly. ‘I didn’t know what hit me. I liked everything about you, your waistcoat, your hair, your eyes, your delectable arse.’

‘Thorin!’ Bilbo pinched his belly in mock protest. ‘Language, my dear.’ They both laughed. Thorin drew Bilbo a little closer, kissing the top of his head.

‘Will you move in here?’ blurted Bilbo suddenly. Thorin could feel he had gone tense.

‘Of course,’ he answered, caressing Bilbo’s back. ‘Of course I will.’

‘Good,’ said Bilbo. He was silent for a while. ‘I...I didn’t want to assume, you know, with mum and everything. It’s a lot to take, I realise that.’

‘I know, sweetheart,’ said Thorin. ‘It won’t always be easy, but I love your mum and we’ll make it work. It won’t be all that different.’

‘We should make the other room on this floor yours,’ said Bilbo, his finger trailing patterns over Thorin’s stomach. ‘Like a study or a library. So you will always have a place you can retreat to, when, you know, when you need your quiet, to be away from ... from me and my silly ways.’

‘I love your silly ways. Besides, they’re not silly,’ said Thorin, illogically. ‘I don’t think I will feel much need to be away from you or mum.’ He included her, because he knew Bilbo deliberately left her out of what he had just said. ‘But I would love to have my library up here. You are right that it is a good idea for me to have my own space. Like you have your room.’ 

‘The house isn’t that big,’ said Bilbo. ‘It’s maybe a little cramped for three adults.’ 

‘We’ll be alright’

Thorin was beginning to drift off when Bilbo spoke again.

‘Thorin?’

‘Hmm?’

‘Sometimes I can’t believe you are real. I can’t think of anyone willing to move in with their boyfriend and his mother and her Alzheimer’s.’

Thorin opened his eyes, forcing himself awake. 

‘First of all you’re my fiancé now,’ he said. ‘And soon you will be my husband. And secondly.’ He tried to find the right words. ‘Bilbo, the thing I most regret is that I didn’t meet you earlier. I would have loved to know your mum when she was alright. I always mean to ask you about her, what she was like, but I don’t know if you want to talk about that.’

Bilbo didn’t answer. 

‘You don’t have to, darling,’ said Thorin, fearing he had said something wrong. ‘It’s just, I sort of ... adopted her, you see. In my mind. My own mother has been dead a long time, and she never was the sweet, welcoming kind. She was a formidable woman, and never bad for us, but mum is... well, so motherly, even now.’ When he finished talking, he realised that Bilbo’s hand was gripping painfully at his hip and that his chest seemed to be wet where Bilbo’s face was lying on him.

‘You have to stop making me cry like this,’ said Bilbo in a constricted voice. 

‘I never mean to,’ said Thorin softly. 

‘I know, silly,’ chuckled Bilbo. ‘And anyway, they’re happy tears.’ He rubbed his face against Thorin’s chest. ‘Very, very happy.’

‘Good,’ said Thorin, stifling a yawn. ‘Let’s sleep now, love.’

‘Hmm. I will tell you about mum one of these days.’ Soft lips touched his before Thorin drifted off again.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

‘Durin, your boyfriend’s here.’ 

Thorin’s client froze for a moment while he was helping her into her coat. He scowled at Dain, who raised his eyebrows at him. After properly seeing off the client, an elderly lady who had refused to meet his eyes, Thorin went after Dain.

‘That was totally inappropriate, and you know it,’ he bit. 

‘And here I thought you were all out and proud,’ drawled Dain. He didn’t tease Thorin as much as he used to, but occasionally Thorin wanted to slap him. At any rate, being with Bilbo had give Thorin a lot more confidence, so he could bear it more easily. 

‘It has nothing to do with being out. If it had been my wife or my father it would have been just as inappropriate to announce their visit in the presence of a client.’ Which was true, but additionally, being outed to a client might reflect negatively on Erebor Accountancy. Thorin didn’t know how pleased the board would be if clients were aware of his sexual orientation.  
He had learned to deal with occasional homophobic remarks from strangers since he was in an openly gay relationship, but at the office nobody was hostile to his face. He knew there were a few old-fashioned colleagues who didn’t approve, and he still wasn’t sure about Mr Throrson, but they accepted Bilbo’s presence at office parties and apart from Dain there was no friction. And Dain had always been irritating, even before Bilbo, so that didn’t mean too much.

‘Mr Durin.’ Ms Dis approached them in the hallway. ‘Mr Baggins is waiting for you.’

‘Thank you, Ms Dis.’

Thorin turned his back to Dain to walk away with the secretary. Just before they reached the waiting room, where he could already see Bilbo, fiddling with his mobile, she stopped him with a hand on his arm.

‘Congratulations,’ she said softly. His eyes widened in surprise. She smiled. ‘I think it was only half-conscious, but your fiancé couldn’t stop himself flashing his hand in front of my eyes, and when I noticed the ring he smiled so utterly happily that I knew. He confessed immediately.’ She squeezed his arm. ‘I am very happy for you two.’

‘Thank you,’ Thorin said, blushing. ‘Please don’t tell anyone yet.’

‘Of course not. But I don’t think Mr Baggins is going to keep it a secret for very long.’ She winked and despite his embarrassment Thorin smiled.

‘I don’t want it to be a secret very long either,’ he said. ‘I’ll talk to Mr Throrson when he comes back tomorrow.’

‘You do that,’ Ms Dis said. ‘Enjoy your lunch.’

Bilbo met him with a hug and a chaste kiss.

‘Ready for lunch?’ he asked. Thorin nodded and let himself be led by the hand.

‘I thought we might look in here first,’ said Bilbo after they had walked for a while. Thorin saw he had stopped in front of a jeweller’s shop. Bilbo cheeks were lightly tinted. ‘Wedding rings?’ He sounded almost shy. Thorin’s heart made a little jump. True, it wasn’t even two days ago that Thorin proposed, but seeing Bilbo so excited about it gave him a thrill every time. He put his arm around Bilbo’s shoulder.

‘What would you like?’ he asked, watching the rings in the window. This was a different jeweller’s than where he had bought the engagement ring.

‘I think, just a plain yellow gold band?’ Bilbo said. ‘I can’t see you wearing something fancy to be honest, it’s not you.’

‘I see, I’m plain,’ said Thorin with a straight face. Bilbo elbowed him in the side and Thorin flinched, laughing. 

‘I love it when you joke and laugh,’ sighed Bilbo happily, hugging him for a moment. ‘Come, let’s go inside.’

They entered the shop. Two assistants were both occupied with customers, and Bilbo and Thorin had to wait for a few minutes. When one of the couples left the shop, the assistant came over with a welcoming smile.

‘Good afternoon, how may I help you?’

‘Could you show us some gold wedding bands?’ asked Bilbo. 

‘Of course, sir,’ said the assistant, leading them to a counter and taking a board with rings from under it. ‘Who is the lucky groom?’

‘Umm,’ they looked at each other. ‘We are,’ said Bilbo, taking Thorin’s hand

‘I see,’ the assistant said. His face became expressionless. It was subtle, but unfortunately Thorin was now tuned in to reactions like this, and he felt a small flame of anger rise in his belly. He took a deep breath, determined not to ruin this for Bilbo.

‘Thank you, we will take our business elsewhere,’ said Bilbo in a cold voice. The assistant looked up, slightly startled. ‘I will not have our wedding bands tainted by a bigoted shop assistant. Good day to you.’ He turned briskly, still holding Thorin by the hand, and left the shop.

‘That went well,’ Bilbo said outside.

‘The shop where I bought your ring is not far from here,’ said Thorin. ‘I guess I was lucky picking that one, they had no problem with me buying an engagement ring for a man.’

‘Let’s go,’ said Bilbo.

‘ _Tainted by a bigoted shop assistant_ ,’ said Thorin after a while. ‘You do have a way with words, darling.’

‘Hmph,’ grunted Bilbo. Thorin chortled, he squeezed Bilbo’s hand.

‘We’re here,’ said Thorin.

‘If the shop assistant so much as breathes wrong, I’m out of here,’ Bilbo announced as they entered.

‘My, you are feisty today,’ said Thorin with a laugh. He loved it when Bilbo was acting like this.

‘Well, I’m not having them insult our marriage,’ muttered Bilbo, looking around the shop.

‘Good afternoon, sirs.’ The shop assistant approaching them was the same man who had helped Thorin with Bilbo’s engagement ring a few weeks earlier. When he saw Thorin, he smiled and looked at Bilbo ‘Ah, is this the lucky man then?’ 

Bilbo’s face lit up.

‘Yes, this is my fiancé,’ said Thorin proudly. ‘And we are here to look at wedding bands.’

‘Very well, sirs, please follow me.’ 

It didn’t take them long to settle for a pair of smooth gold wedding bands.

‘Do you want the date to be engraved?’

‘Of course,’ said Bilbo. ‘On the inside, with our initials.’ The man produced a form.

‘What is the wedding date?’

Thorin and Bilbo looked at each other, then burst out laughing. The shop assistant smiled, amused.

‘We haven’t got a date yet,’ said Thorin, trying to stop laughing. ‘We have only been engaged for two days.’

‘One and half,’ snickered Bilbo.

The man laughed out loud.

‘At least you seem to be eager,’ he said.

‘Oh yes,’ said Bilbo with a naughty smile. ‘Very eager.’

‘To be honest,’ said Thorin, turning serious. ‘We don’t want to wait very long. But we will have to give notice first I guess, and find a venue for the reception.’

‘Very well,’ said the man. ‘I will just put these rings aside and wait for further instructions, if you are willing to make a down payment.’

‘Of course,’ Thorin pulled out his wallet.

‘No, no, why do you have to pay for everything? You already bought me an engagement ring!’ Bilbo had his own wallet in his hand. ‘I’m taking this one.’ He slapped his bank card on the counter. Thorin gave in.

‘I can always pay the main sum when we pick them up,’ he whispered in Bilbo’s ear.

‘You, sir, are a scoundrel,’ said Bilbo sternly, tapping Thorin’s sharp nose with a finger.

The shop assistant was trying to hide his smile while he took their details.

‘If you don’t mind a suggestion,’ he said. ‘My cousin and his husband held their wedding in a very nice tea shop last year. There’s a garden as well and it is an approved venue. I could give you the address, so you can check it out.’

They left the jeweller’s with the information in Bilbo’s pocket and in a very good mood.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

‘I still think you should send Frerin an invitation,’ said Bilbo.

‘I will not,’ said Thorin grumpily. All this wedding stuff was beginning to irritate him. Who would have thought there was so much to organise? Flowers, drinks, invitations, gift lists, the colour of the table cloths, cake, finger food. He dropped his face to the table.

Suddenly a hand stroked his back.

‘Why don’t you let me take care of this?’ asked Bilbo softly. ‘You have enough on your shoulders with Stormcrow and your flat.’

Thorin looked up.

‘I thought you wanted to do it together?’

‘Not if it ruins your mood.’ Bilbo bent over to kiss him on the forehead. ‘Just trust me, I promise not to go overboard with bright, frilly and flowery things.’

Thorin chuckled. He tilted his head backward, inviting Bilbo to kiss his mouth. Bilbo obliged, grinning.

‘Okay,’ sighed Thorin. ‘It’s all yours. But I’m telling you it’s a waste of effort to invite Frerin.’

‘Let’s try. You have so little family and friends to invite as it is.’

‘Oh, very well.’ Thorin put down the leaflet with damask table cloths he had been looking at. Bilbo took hold of his head with both hands.

‘Now please try to let go of your bad mood, darling. I will ask Primula to help me, is that alright?’

Thorin nodded, leaning against Bilbo’s belly, arms around his fiancé’s hips. He sighed again. It was all a bit much: organizing the wedding, selling his own flat, finalizing the financing of Stormcrow Books, trying to decide which of his possessions he wanted to take with him to Bilbo’s house. And then there was his own professional future. He felt an increasing desire to leave Erebor Accountancy and find a way to be home with mum more, as well as help Bilbo with the bookshop. They had a number of exciting ideas, one of which was exploiting a tea and coffee shop within Stormcow. Or whatever it was going to be named. They were going to have a webshop as well, and Bilbo was even enquiring after selling ebooks there, however much it seemed blasphemy to Thorin. 

‘I talked to Balin,’ Thorin said, holding on to Bilbo. ‘About starting my own bookkeeping business.’

‘What did he say?’ Bilbo was rocking him gently to some unknown rhythm.

‘He seemed to think there would be enough opportunity to have a nice income from it, though obviously not as much as at Erebor. Especially since I intend to work less hours.’ He lifted his head to look up at Bilbo. ‘And I still like the idea of setting up my business in the flat above the shop. I'll be doing your bookkeeping anyway.’

‘Renting it out would generate more money.’ 

‘I’m not so sure. I have to have some sort of office anyway, and I quite like the idea of being able to see you more and help out in the shop. Plus we could take mum with us some of the time, she could sit upstairs with me when I don’t have clients over.’

‘On Mondays you would have the place all to yourself,’ Bilbo said. ‘You could try to plan your clients on Mondays as much as possible.’

‘Hmm. Is it okay if I work this plan out, go over figures and calculations?’

‘Yes, love.’ Bilbo was stroking his hair absentmindedly. ‘We’re taking a lot of risks,’ he said. ‘Both of us quitting our jobs and starting our own ventures.’

‘I can wait, if you prefer.’ Thorin didn’t like the idea of staying at Erebor for much longer, but he would do anything to keep Bilbo from worrying. ‘I am looking into ways to put the remaining money from my investments and accounts away so it will give us a nice interest we can use to supplement our income.’ They had agreed that they would use part of Thorin’s money – well, soon to be *their* money – for Stormcrow, making it easier to attain the rest of the financing. Bilbo refused to use all of it.

Bilbo pushed him away gently, so he could see his face. After a long look, he shook his head.

‘No, I can see you don’t want that. I want you to be happy, sweetie.’

‘I am happy.’ It was the truth. Aside from temporary dips caused by being overwhelmed with everything, Thorin had never been so happy or content in his life. He loved Bilbo, he loved mum, he loved all their plans and his idea of what their future would be like.

Bilbo sat down on Thorin’s lap and pulled him into a long, intense kiss. Thorin melted into his beloved’s arms, thinking that he really didn’t need anything else in the world.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

‘Hello? Anybody home?’ Bilbo waved his hand in front of Thorin’s staring eyes. ‘They’re finally getting their luggage now apparently.’ He sat down next to Thorin on the dingy blue seats of the airport waiting area.

‘I still can’t believe they are coming,’ said Thorin. 

‘His only brother is getting married, Thorin.’

‘Yes, well.’ There had been no reaction to the fact that Thorin was marrying a man. At least Frerin and his wife had had a few weeks to get used to the fact. If he sensed even the slightest resentment towards Bilbo, Thorin would flatly refuse them entrance to the tea shop that was the venue of their wedding.

People were beginning to trickle through the doors.

‘There, is that them?’ Bilbo pointed to a man who looked like a blond, slightly smaller version of Thorin and a full-figured woman of about Bilbo’s height with auburn hair and a stern face.

‘Yes,’ said Thorin, rising and buttoning his jacket. Bilbo did the same, carding a hand through his unruly curls. 

‘You look fine, sweetheart. If they don’t adore you on sight, they can go right through to Departures.’ Thorin looked determined.

Bilbo laughed. Thorin took his arm and strode purposefully toward his brother.

‘Frerin,’ he said. 

‘Thorin,’ answered Frerin. While they shook hands, Frerin’s eyes took in Bilbo.

‘This is Bilbo, my fiancé,’ said Thorin. ‘Bilbo, this is my brother Frerin and his wife Lobelia.’

While the visitors shook Bilbo’s hand, Thorin scrutinized them for any indication of disrespect. He found none. To his surprise they both seemed mainly curious. Thorin had only met Lobelia twice: once at their wedding, and once two years later when they had visited. She had been widowed at a young age, left a fortune by her older husband. Thorin had always found her quite formidable, a bit like his own mother. There was a son from her first marriage, who was off to some university by now. 

‘Pleased to meet you,’ said Bilbo, smiling his most charming smile. ‘I am so happy you could come.’

Once they were seated in Thorin’s car, Bilbo, who was sitting in the back with Lobelia, grabbed his mobile.

‘Sorry, I have to make a call,’ he apologized. ‘Hello, Mrs Proudfoot? It’s Bilbo. I’m afraid we are indeed getting late, so if you would take over from Lily... yes thanks ever so much... I’m not sure, traffic is pretty busy...’

Thorin glanced at the clock and made a quick calculation.

‘Around six I think,’ he said.

Bilbo repeated that to Mrs Proudfoot and finished his call.

‘We’ll be dropping Bilbo off first,’ Thorin stated. ‘Are you sure about the hotel? You can still stay in my flat.’

‘Yeah, we’re sure,’ said Lobelia. ‘Besides, you need a place to stay the night before the wedding.’

‘Oh no, not you too!’ exclaimed Bilbo. ‘I have been telling Thorin it’s a ridiculous tradition but he insists, dinosaur that he is.’

Thorin laughed, checking Bilbo’s expression in the rear view mirror. He noticed Frerin giving him an odd look.

Thorin halted the car in front of Bilbo’s house and stepped out of the car to open Bilbo’s door.

‘See you tonight, darling,’ Bilbo said, kissing him before going into the house.

When Thorin got into the car again, he received another one of Frerin’s looks.

‘Why isn’t Bilbo joining us for dinner tonight?’ asked Lobelia.

‘We didn’t want to impose on anyone, since they will all be there the day after tomorrow as well.’ When he received blank looks, he realised they didn’t know. ‘It’s mum, Bilbo’s mother. She suffers from Alzheimer’s and she can’t be left alone. So we have to organize sitters, and we’ve asked rather a lot of the neighbours and Bilbo’s cousins lately, since we’ve been so busy.’

‘Bilbo’s mother lives with him? And you are going to live with them both?’ Lobelia sounded incredulous.

‘Yes,’ answered Thorin curtly. ‘She’s lovely, you will meet her tomorrow.’ His knuckles were white where he was gripping the steering wheel. ‘Besides, I live there part of the week already.’

‘Wow,’ said Frerin under his breath. Thorin had no idea whether he meant it in a negative or positive way, and he wasn’t sure he wanted to deal with that right now.

Thorin drove to the hotel Frerin and Lobelia had booked. After they had checked in and brought the luggage up to their room, Lobelia suggested that Frerin and Thorin go down to the bar while she took a shower and dressed for dinner.

So, Thorin found himself with a glass of orange juice, sitting next to his brother in the spacious hotel bar. Frerin drank half of his pint of bitter before turning his gaze to Thorin.

‘So,’ he said. ‘Bilbo.’

‘Yes,’ said Thorin, tensing slightly.

‘You are marrying a man.’

‘Yes,’ said Thorin, clenching his fist around his glass and trying to stay calm.

‘I never knew that about you. Of course your lack of girlfriends should have been a clue, but there weren’t really any boyfriends either, I think.’

Thorin grunted something unintelligble.

‘So, how does it work? You’re obviously the man in the relationship.’

‘Don’t be ridiculous, we’re both men.’ Thorin scowled at Ferin.

‘Yes, but you open doors for him, and he’s the one wearing an engagement ring, not you. You are clearly the dominant one.’

Thorin barked out a laugh.

‘I’d like to see you say that to Bilbo’s face,’ he said, grinning. ‘He’ll skin you alive.’

Frerin spilled some of his beer when he choked on it.

‘He seemed so nice,’ he said, wiping his mouth and throwing Thorin another curious look.

‘Oh, he is nice, but he’s also pretty feisty when he feels like it.’ Thorin sipped on his juice with a satisfied smirk. He couldn’t remember ever feeling so confident in Frerin’s presence.

‘Look,’ said Frerin, putting his glass down. ‘I’m not going to pretend I understand this... this gay thing, but you seem happier than I’ve ever seen you, so I guess it’s fine.’

‘I _am_ happy,’ said Thorin, feeling relieved by his brother’s honesty and acceptance. ‘And there’s not much to understand: I love Bilbo and he loves me, and we are going to spend the rest of our lives together as a married couple, just like your straight thing.’

Frerin uttered a surprised chuckle and raised his glass.

‘I’ll drink to that then,’ he said.

‘Thanks,’ said Thorin earnestly, touching his glass to Frerin’s. He glanced at him while he drank. Frerin seemed different: calmer, more mature than he remembered. Well, they were both over a decade older.

‘At least I have finally discovered one thing we have in common,’ said Frerin after putting his empty glass down. Thorin raised his eyebrows. He couldn’t think of anything really.

‘We both like them plump,’ said his brother with a wink. After a moment of dumbfounded silence, Thorin began to laugh.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o

 

The doorbell rang as Thorin was buttoning up his waistcoat. Was it that late already? 

‘Hello, Mr Durin.’ Ms Dis looked beautiful in a dark blue dress and her hair done up in an intricate fashion.

‘Thorin, please,’ said Thorin, letting her in. ‘You are my witness today, and I insist you call me Thorin from now on.’

‘With pleasure, Thorin,’ said Ms Dis. ‘Please call me Crystal, or Crys.’ Thorin stared at her. 

‘That is a beautiful name.’ He shouldn’t have sounded so surprised, but he had never given any thought to her first name.

She smiled.

‘Thank you. And thank you once again for the honour of asking me as your witness. Are you sure you don’t want your brother to be your witness, now that he is actually here?’

‘Very sure,’ Thorin said. ‘I am glad Frerin has come, but you have been supporting us right from the start, and I have very much appreciated that.’ When Bilbo had first suggested it, Thorin had been mortified by the idea of asking her, but after a while he realised that he would really like the kind secretary to be his witness. And when he finally worked up the courage, she had agreed eagerly, eyes shining.

‘Let me look at you,’ Ms Dis, Crystal, said. Nobody but Bilbo and mum had seen their wedding suits. ‘Oh, you look dashing. What colour is your coat?’

‘It’s here.’ Thorin picked up the dark blue, tailored coat and pulled it on over his ivory waistcoat, white shirt and light blue tie. His striped trousers were grey. 

‘Wow,’ said Crystal. ‘You really are a sight to behold.’ 

Thorin blushed, looking in the hallway mirror. He did look good, he had to admit it. Bilbo had insisted to buy their suits together, not caring that it would therefore not be a surprise on the wedding day. He wanted them both to look their absolute best, he had said. And Thorin thought he had succeeded there. He knew what Bilbo’s suit looked like, and he couldn’t wait to see him in it.

‘Thank you,’ he said. ‘Bilbo picked it.’

‘Of course he did,’ smiled Crystal. ‘So, are you ready? Do you need anything to take with you?’

Thorin felt in his pocket for the piece of paper with his vows, checked his hair and beard in the mirror one last time. 

‘Do you...’

‘I have the rings.’ Crystal held up the small blue velvet box.

Thorin suppressed the need to check the box to see if the rings were really in it, then followed Crystal out the door, locked his half empty flat and got into the car. It was about half an hour’s drive to the teashop, which seemed too short and too long at the same time. Thorin wasn’t nervous about marrying Bilbo, but he was tense about everything going well and not disappointing Bilbo. He wanted to get through the ceremony without stuttering, blushing and generally making a fool of himself.

By the time they arrived, his stomach was feeling strange and he regretted having eaten even a small breakfast. They parked at a side entrance to the building. Drogo’s car was already there, which meant Bilbo and mum had arrived before Thorin. Crystal held the door open for him, which felt decidedly strange and he tried to let her go in first. She refused with a smile.

To the left of the short corridor was the room where the grooms and their witnesses would stay until the ceremony. Thorin could hear voices, Bilbo and Primula. He stepped over the threshold and the voices stopped immediately.

There he was, Bilbo, his soon to be husband. Thorin’s knees became weak when he saw him. Even though he had seen him in the suit before, nothing compared to seeing him today, radiating happiness. His suit was light grey, his shirt white, his waistcoat a dark purple and his tie – yes a normal tie, to Thorin’s surprise – the same colour. His dark blonde curls were already slightly mussed, as they always were. 

They looked at each other in silence for a moment, then Bilbo was right in front of him and they kissed each other greedily.

‘Hey, hey!’ Primula cried. ‘Save it for the ceremony, boys.’

Smiling, they parted reluctantly. 

‘You look ravishing,’ whispered Bilbo. ‘Absolutely stunning.’

‘And you,’ said Thorin, who couldn’t take his eyes off Bilbo.

Then they were each gripped by a pair of arms and pulled apart. 

‘Off!’ said Primula, trying not to laugh. ‘It’s bad enough you have already seen each other’s suits and are together before the ceremony. I will not have you all over each other before you are properly married.’

Drogo was grinning while he dragged Thorin to one side of the room.

‘Come, say hello to your mother in law,’ he said. Mum was sitting in a chair, looking a bit lost. Thorin crouched in front of her.

‘Hello mum,’ he said softly. She looked at him and a hesitant smile appeared on her face.

‘Why weren’t you at breakfast today?’ she asked. ‘Bilbo says it’s Sunday, but it doesn’t feel like Sunday.’

‘That’s because it’s rather a special Sunday,’ said Thorin. Oh please let her be lucid today of all days. ‘It’s mine and Bilbo’s wedding day.’ He heard the click of a camera, and although he was a little bit irritated by what felt like an intrusion, he realised that he wanted every bit of this day recorded, so they could watch it with mum often.

‘Oh! That is wonderful!’ Mum’s eyes began to shine. ‘I forgot. I think Bilbo told me.’

‘That’s alright,’ Thorin said. We will tell you all day long if needed. ‘We are so happy you are here with us, though I know it may be a bit tiring and confusing for you.’

She looked at him sternly.

‘I’m no delicate flower, you know. I remember our own wedding day.’ She looked around. ‘That was nothing like this though. Why aren’t we in a church?’

‘This is just as nice,’ Thorin promised. ‘You’ll see. What do you think of my suit?’ He stood and turned around for her, blushing as he saw the eyes of the others on him.

‘You are as handsome as ever, Thorin,’ mum said. Her eyes seemed a little clearer. She beckoned him over and hugged him. ‘I am so happy you are marrying my Bilbo,’ she said.

‘Me too,’ said Thorin, holding her tight.

‘We went to an island for our honeymoon,’ mum said. ‘I can’t seem to remember the name right now, but it was really nice. There were beautiful flowers. Where are you going?’

‘We’re going to the country for a few days,’ said Thorin. ‘Drogo and Primula are staying with you, remember? I think we told you.’ He knew they had told her at least a dozen times already.

‘Oh, yes,’ said mum. He was sure she didn’t really remember.

‘Let’s take a few pictures.’ Drogo was holding up his camera. ‘First I want the grooms and their mum.’

After they had taken pictures in different constellations, it was getting near the time for the ceremony. Crystal had gone to check in the main room and reported that the guests had all arrived. Primula then took mum with her to sit on the front row. The celebrant, with whom Bilbo and Thorin had had two preparatory meetings, came to talk for a moment, to make sure everything was going as planned. He was an elderly man, a former priest, who specialised in same sex weddings.

Finally, Bilbo and Thorin were left with the two witnesses, Drogo and Crystal.

‘So, this is it,’ said Drogo. ‘Are you two ready?’

‘Yes,’ said Thorin. Somehow his nerves had disappeared. Bilbo was standing next to him and that was the only thing that meant anything.

‘Yes,’ said Bilbo, his voice sounded wobbly. Thorin turned to him. 

‘Are you alright, sweetheart?’ he asked. Bilbo nodded, but his face denied it. Thorin folded his arms around him. ‘What is it, my love?’ he asked. ‘No second thoughts I hope?’ A tiny sliver of doubt entered his mind.

Bilbo held him tight. 

‘Of course not. It’s just a bit much.’ He inhaled deeply. ‘You know, with mum.’

They were quiet for a moment. Drogo touched Bilbo’s arm. 

‘We need to be going,’ he said. ‘ [The Wedding March](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z0wmzoHd6yo) is about to start, don’t be late!’ 

‘The Wedding March, really?’ Thorin looked at Bilbo. ‘How soppy is that?’

Bilbo chuckled, hiding his face in Thorin’s neck.

‘I’m sorry, mum wanted it and I ... well, I wanted it too.’ Bilbo looked up, defying Thorin to laugh. Thorin just kissed him on the forehead.

‘Let’s go,’ he said, taking Bilbo’s hand.

Drogo and Crystal were standing at the door to the main room.

‘They will start the music as soon as Crystal and I enter,’ Drogo said. ‘You are to wait a few moments and then follow us in.’

Thorin and Bilbo nodded, they knew the procedure.

‘Ready?’ Drogo looked at Crystal. She nodded, Drogo opened the door and they went in. A moment later, the music started. Thorin and Bilbo locked eyes, took a deep breath and walked in, hand in hand.

Thorin didn’t remember a whole lot of the ceremony afterwards. The picture that remained with him was Bilbo in his beautiful outfit, looking at him in adoration. And the vows. Somehow, he remembered every word of the vows. 

His own stumbling words.

My dearest Bilbo,  
You took my heart many months ago  
And I willingly relinquished it to you.  
I promise to hold and cherish you,  
Stand by you and yours in good and bad times  
As long as I am able to  
For I love you with everything I am  
And you are my dream 

However inadequate they seemed, even after sweating on them for hours, Bilbo’s eyes had filled with emotion and he mouthed ‘I love you’ and there were ‘awws’ in the audience.

Then came Bilbo, who cleared his throat and started in a clear voice:

My beautiful darling  
My dwarven knight in tailored suit  
My mate, my rock, my sweetie 

Bilbo had to stop here to wipe away a tear and clear the lump in his throat. 

You entered my house and my heart  
And never left again  
You took me and mum in your big arms  
And your even bigger heart  
I cannot imagine a life without you now  
Nor would I ever want to  
You are the love of my life  
Mine to hold and yours to keep  
I pledge myself to you in every way  
And will always stand beside you  
I love you 

Thorin didn’t even try to hide his tears.

The room stayed quiet when they exchanged rings, right until the celebrant finally pronounced them wed. When they kissed, tenderly and deeply, the audience erupted in applause and cheering. 

A deep sigh loosened from Thorin’s chest when he held Bilbo close, looking at their mum beaming on the front row. 

‘This is my dream, sweetheart,’ he whispered to his husband. ‘Us.’

Bilbo lifted his face up to him, eyes moist.

‘It’s my dream too, my love.’ 

And Thorin kissed him again. However things would go with the shop, Bilbo’s book, his own work and mum, they would manage. Together.

 

[](http://s486.photobucket.com/user/marieketie/media/dreamsboardipdef_zps9e55c930.jpg.html)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was the final chapter! If in future I have some more inspiration in this ‘verse’ I will probably post it separately as a series.
> 
> I made a photo collage picturing Bilbo and Thorin as I envisaged them and the suits they wore at Thorin's office party and the wedding, as well as Bilbo's engagement ring.
> 
> And please don’t hit me for pairing Frerin with Lobelia :-) there are no official female dwarf names around that I could find, and I did want a Tolkien name. It's kind of funny to imagine Frerin with Lobelia, isn't it? She isn't such a dislikable character here, but she's still formidable.
> 
> I tried so hard to give links to videos of the music, but it doesn't work :( 
> 
> I gave Ms Dis a first name that ties in with dwarven ways (mining --> crystal).
> 
>  
> 
> Let me know what you think of this chapter?  
> 


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